


The Breakfast Club: Retold.

by FanFictionerForLife1994



Category: The Breakfast Club (1985)
Genre: 80's Movies, Brian Gets A Girl, Drama, High School, John Huges, Multi, No Fifth Wheel Brian, Romance, Teen Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-19
Updated: 2016-07-20
Packaged: 2018-07-25 11:21:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 23,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7530787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanFictionerForLife1994/pseuds/FanFictionerForLife1994
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Six students all have detention for eight hours and deal with many ups and downs including themselves. They met only once, but it changed their lives forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. TBCR: Chapter One.

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Come Together](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/214270) by ALovelyEccentricSoul. 



> This is a fanfic. I do NOT own anything related to The Breakfast Club. This is simply me doing a dream fan based story. The only thing I do own is my Original Created Character and my own plot of this story. Also, some of the deleted scenes that were cut from the movie will be written and the story will continue on from Sunday, Monday, school, prom and on to the future. Thank you.
> 
>  
> 
> Sequel Coming soon as well.

"... And these children that you spit on, as they try to change their worlds are immune to your consultations. They're quite aware of what they're going through...

\- David Bowie"

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Brian's Monologue: Saturday...March 24th, 1984. Shermer High School, Shermer Illinois. 60062. Dear Mr. Vernon...we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong, what we did was wrong. But we think you're crazy to make us write this essay telling you who we think we are, what do you care? You see us as you want to see us...in the simplest terms and the most convenient definitions. You see us as a brain, a breed, an athlete, a basket case, a princess, and a criminal. Correct? That's the way we saw each other at seven o'clock this morning. We were brainwashed...

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

First to show up outside is Claire Standish with her father and a BMW. Claire is the prom-queen and clearly a snob but most times she can be a conceded bitch as some would say.

Claire: I can't believe you can't get me out of this...I mean it's so absurd I have to be here on a Saturday! It's not like I'm defective or anything.

Claire's Father: I'll make it up to you...Honey, ditching class to go shopping doesn't make you a defective. Have a good day.

Claire rolls her eyes and gets out of the car and walks up the school's front steps as her father drives off. Then next to show up is Brian Johnson with his mom and little sister. Brian is the typical nerd or geek in school and would have a hard time fitting in.

Brian's Mother: (Angry) Hey! Is this the first time or last time we do this?

Brian: (Nervous) Last...

Brian's Mother: Well get in there and use the time to your advantage...

Brian: Mom, we're not supposed to study; we just have to sit there and do nothing.

Brian's Mother: Well mister you figure out a way to study!

Brian's Sister: (Annoyingly) Yeah!

Brian's Mother: Well go!

Brian gets out of the car, shuts the door and walks up to the school.

Next to show up is Andrew Clark, Andy for short. Andrew was the school jock and wrestler, wearing a letterman's jacket with patches. He shows up with his dad in his truck.

Andrew's Father: Hey, I screwed around...guys screw around, there's nothing wrong with that. Except you got caught, Sport.

Andrew: Yeah, Mom already reemed me, alright?

Andrew's Father: You wanna miss a match? You wanna blow your ride? Now no school's gonna give a scholarship to a discipline case!

Andrew glares at his father then gets out of the truck, slams the door and walks up to the school.

Next to show up walking is John Bender, mostly people just call him by his last name as if it was his first. Bender was the school's resident trouble maker, rebel, badass or punk as many people would have a lot of things to say about him, some in good ways but most of the times are bad. As he's walking, a car is coming towards him but he doesn't stop walking and then the car slams directly on it's breaks in front of him.

Next to show up from the exact same car that almost hit Bender is Allison Reynolds. To people she's the weird child, psycho, crazy but mostly she is known as the basket-case. She comes out of the car wearing all black, and then steps forward to the car's front window to say goodbye to her mother but the car drives off quickly leaving a screeching tire noise leaving Allison to walk up to the school.

And last but not least (Literally) to show up was Bernia Lee. She was what every boy had dreamed of being with and who could blame them? She's just as mysterious as she is seductive. She had looks, beauty, brains but most of all what women would die to keep, power.

She has that kind of manipulative opportunist mind to get what she wants and she can be real bitch about it even when she doesn't get it but in a sexy way. She was of course a breed due to her being a biker chick yet a femme fatale. She arrived on her Honda V-65 Magna Motorcycle, parked it right next to the school stairs then took out the keys, put them in her pocket and walked into the school. Thus walking into what would be the most unpredictable 8 hours ever.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////


	2. TBCR: Chapter Two.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now inside, the brainwashed labels take their seats.

Now into the school's library, there are six tables in two rows of three. Claire comes in and sits at the table in front of her. Brian then comes in and sits at the table behind her. Andrew then comes in, walks to the table where Claire is sitting and points to the chair next to her. She shrugs her shoulders and Andrew sits. Bender then walks in as he touches everything on the checkout desk and even takes a few things. He looks over to where Brian is sitting, lifts up his shades and walks up to Brian pointing to the next table beside him. Brian reluctantly gets up and picks up his hat off the ground then sits in the other middle table, then Bender sits where Brian once was puts his feet up on the table. Allison then walks in but she walks all the way around the library and sits at the back corner table, just behind Brian. Andrew and Claire look at each other and snicker while Brian looks at Allison in confusion. Last to enter is Bernia as she walks in with her hips swaying as everyone looks at her. Bender, Brian and Andrew look at her in awe, Claire in disgust and Allison in wonder. She sits at the other front table next to Andrew and Claire with Brian behind her. She then turns around at Brian and winks at him as Brian turns away quickly blushing and she smiles.

Then enters Mr. Richard Vernon the teacher. He was an asshole to a lot of people and that was THE understatement. He holds a stack of papers in his left hand and just glares at everyone.

Vernon: Well...well. Here we are! I want to congratulate you for being on time...

Claire then raises her hand.

Claire: Excuse me sir? I think there's been a mistake. I know it's detention, but...um...I don't think I belong in here...

Vernon not caring continues to lecture them.

Vernon: It is now seven o'six. You have exactly eight hours and fifty-four minutes to think about why you're here. To ponder the error of your ways...

As Vernon is talking, Bender leans back in his chair, puts his head back to spit in the air only for him to catch the spit in his mouth again. Claire saw this and looked away and scoffed in disgust.

Vernon: ...And you may not talk.

Claire gives Vernon the "That's not fair look."

Brian puts his backpack in the other chair beside him and tries to sit but Vernon stops him.

Vernon: You will not move from these seats.

Brian hesitates but stays seated in his original chair.

Bernia is chewing gum and then pops it. Vernon then glares at her.

Vernon: No gum chewing or popping....

Bernia glares back at Vernon, stands up and then spits the gum on his shoe. Then sits back down.

Vernon: ...Or spitting. And that's another Saturday detention for you Ms. Lee.

Bernia grins at Vernon as he then walks up to Bender.

Vernon: ...And you...

Vernon then snatches the chair from under Bender's feet.

Vernon: ...will not sleep. Alright people, we're gonna do something a little different today. We are going to write an essay, of no less than a thousand words, describing to me who you think you are.

Bender: Is this a test?

Vernon: And when I say essay, I mean essay. I do not mean a single word repeated a thousand times. Is that clear Mr. Bender?

Bender: Crystal.

Vernon: Good. Maybe you'll learn a little something about yourself. Maybe you'll even decide, whether or not you care to return.

Brian raises his hand and then stands.

Brian: You know, I can answer that right now sir...That'd be no.

Vernon: Sit down Johnson...

Brian: Thank you sir...

Brian then sits back down.

Vernon: My office...is right across the hall. Any monkey business is ill-advised. Any questions?

Bender: Yeah...I got a question. Does Barry Manilow know you raid his wardrobe?

Bernia : And does he also know that you're his and Pee-Wee Herman's love child?

Brian, Andrew, Claire silently snicker while Bender smirks.

Vernon: I'll give you the answers to those questions Mr. Bender and Ms. Lee, next Saturday. That's a third detention for you. (Pointing to Bernia). Don't mess with the bull you two, you'll get the horns.

Vernon then turns to walk away into his office.

Bender: That man...is a brownie hound...

Bernia: I'll say. He reminds me of my ex boyfriend.

Bender: How?

Bernia: He didn't live up to his "standards".

Bender smirks. He knew that he would get along at least with someone in detention.

Everyone tries to get comfortable when they hear a loud snapping sound. Brian, Andrew and Claire turn around to look and see it's Allison, biting her nails. Everyone then looks at her with Bender's eyes widen and Bernia does the same. Allison stops when she notices them staring, but continues anyway.

Bender: You keep eating your hand and you're not gonna be hungry for lunch.

Allison stops and spits the peace of finger nail at Bender's direction.

Bender: I've seen you before, you know. (Now points at Allison)

Vernon then looks out the door from his office.

Brian then takes his pen, attaching it to his bottom lip and puts the top under his upper lip mumbling to himself.

Brian: (Mumbling silently) Who do you think I am? Who are you? Who are you? I am a Walrus...

Bernia looks behind to see what Brian is doing and giggles at him making Brian blush again. But then he notices Bender looking at him in utter confusion, embarrassed Brian takes the pen from his mouth. Then both Bender and Brian both began to take their jackets off at the same time but they both notice. Bender takes off his jacket while Brian stops, rubbing his hands together pretending to be cold then putting his jacket back on as Bender still looks at him.

Brian: It's the shits, huh?

Bender glares at him and Brian utters a uncomfortable laugh. Bender then turns away and crumples his essay paper, throws it at Claire but it missed as it goes over her head. She and Andrew both acknowledge this but continue to ignore Bender. Bender then starts loudly "singing" a part from the song "Sunshine Of Your Love" by Cream.

Claire: I can't believe this is really happening to me...

Bender: Oh shit! What are we supposed to do if we hafta take a piss?

Claire: (Disgusted) Please...

Bender: Well, if you gotta go, you gotta go.

Bender then unzips his fly.

Claire: (Disgusted) Oh my God!

Andrew: Hey! You're not urinating in here man!

Bender: Don't talk! Don't talk! It makes it crawl back up!

Brian tries to look to see if he was bluffing.

Andrew: You whip it out and you're dead before the first drop hits the floor!

Bender: You're pretty sexy when you get angry...grrr.

Bender then turns to Brian again.

Bender: (To Brian) Hey, homeboy...

Brians points to himself with his pen.

Bender: ...why don't you go close that door. We'll get the prom queen and vixen...impregnated!

Claire glares at Bender while Bernia smirks and raises an eyebrow.

Bernia: Ha! Not until your sack drops first little boy.

Bender gives her a blank stare.

Andrew: Hey.

Bender ignores him.

Andrew: Hey!

Bender: What?

Andrew: If I lose my temper, you're totaled man.

Bender: (Mockingly) "Totally?"

Andrew: Totally.

Claire: (To Bender) Why don't you just shut up! Nobody here is interested!

Andrew: (To Claire about Bender) Really! (To Bender) Buttface!

Bender: Well hey Sporto! What'd you do to get in here? Forget to wash your jock?

Brian: (Nervous) Uh, excuse me fellas? I think we should just write our papers...

Andrew: (To Bender) Look, just because you live here doesn't give you the right to be a pain in the ass...so knock it off!

Bender mockingly registers pain in his face.

Bender: It's a free country...

Claire: (To Andrew) He's just doing it to get a rise out of you! Just ignore him...

Bender flips his hair.

Bender: (To Claire) Sweets...you couldn't ignore me if you tried.

Claire rolls her eyes.

Bender: (To Andrew and Claire) So...so! Are you guys like boyfriend/girlfriend?

Andrew beats the table.

Bender: (To Andrew and Claire) Steady dates?

Andrew beats the table again.

Bender: (To Andrew and Claire) Lo--vers?

Andrew then beats the table a final time.

Bender: (To Andrew) Come on Sporto, level with me. You slip her the hot...beef...injection?

Both Andrew and Claire turn around furiously at Bender.

Claire: GO TO HELL!

Andrew: ENOUGH!

Vernon: Hey! What's going on in there? (Silently) Smug little pricks.

Everyone looks at each other before Claire and Andrew turn away from Bender.

Andrew: (To himself about Bender) Scumbag!


	3. TBCR: Chapter Three.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bender creates more hell while Bernia flirts with Brian and sasses Claire.

Bender now stands up walking to the railing and sits on it. But then Bernia also gets up and walks to Brian's table and sits next to him. Brian looks up at her, nervous as he's ever been.

Bernia: Hey.

Brian: Hi...

Bernia: (Seductive) What's your name sweetie?

Brian: Um, I'm B- Brian. Brian Johnson.

Bernia looks at Brian with seduction, almost with lust in her eyes making Brian blush even more. She then took the time to check him out.

Bernia: Brian Johnson...hmmm. The name's Lee, Bernia Lee.

They both shake hands. Bernia then bites her lip causing Brian to look down and look up again getting her to smile.

Brian: You have a nice accent. Um, w- where you from?

Bernia: Well my mother is from Ireland and my father is French-Canadian. Thanks.

Brian: You're welcome.

Bender notices Bernia and Brian talking.

Bernia: So, what do you do on your spare time Johnson?

Brian: Well, there's n-not really much anything fun about me...to be honest.

Bernia: (Chuckles) Well I would like to know...if you "want" me.

Andrew and Claire even look to see Bernia flirting with Brian.

Bender: Uh yeah. Hey! When you're done pretending flirting with the nerd here, what do you say we close that door? We can't have any kind of party with Vernon checking us out every few seconds.

Bernia: Hey, do you mind? I'm trying to "actually" have a conversation with someone who's not insane. And besides, who said I was pretending?

Brian's eyes wide as Bender, Andrew and Claire look at Bernia with wide eyes as well. Bernia smiles at Brian again really making him nervous which she loved. Bernia knew that Brian would be hers and Brian didn't know it, yet.

Claire: You're serious? You "actually" like "him"? Of all people?

Bernia: So what if I do "princess"? What? does someone like him not fit my standards or yours? Let me get something straight here, I'm not gonna be stuck-up like you. At least I'm women enough to admit that I'll hang out with anybody and not leave them high and dry. So you, can shove up your ass!

Claire: Bitch!

Bernia: Prude!

Bender: So, what do you say? Should we close the door ladies and gents?

Brian: Well, you know the door supposed to stay open...

Bender: So what?

Andrew: So why don't you shut up! There's five other people in here you know...

Bender: God, you can count. See! I knew you had to be smart to be a...a wrestler.

Andrew: Who the hell are you to judge anybody anyway?

Claire: Really...

Andrew: You know, Bender...you don't even count. I mean if you disappeared forever it wouldn't make a difference. You might as well not even exist in this school.

Bender not even looking Andrew in the eyes look away with a bored expression on his face. He probably was upset by this but doesn't let his emotions out.

Bernia: You little shit!

Andrew looks over to Bernia.

Andrew: Hey, was I even talking to you?

Bernia: Bottom line, no one deserves that you asshole!

Andrew just scoffs and looks back at Bender who takes a hard swallow.

Bender: Well...I'll just run out and join the wrestling team.

Andrew and Claire look at each other, then laugh at Bender.

Bender: (To Claire) Maybe the prep club too! Student council...

Andrew: No, they wouldn't take you.

Bender: (Mockingly) I'm hurt.

Claire: You know why guys like you knock everything...?

Bender: (To himself) Oh, this should be stunning...

Claire: It's because you're afraid.

Bender: (Mocked Enthusiasm) Oh God! You richies are so smart, that's exactly why I'm not heavy in activities!

Claire: You're a big coward!

Brian feeling left out speaks.

Brian: I'm in the math club.

Claire: See you're afraid they won't take you. You don't belong so you just have to dump all over it...

Bernia: (Rolls her eyes) Oh please!

Claire: (To Bernia) Why don't you be quiet huh? Keep flirting with nerd boy why don't ya?

Bernia: What? Jealous?

Claire: (Rolls her eyes) Yeah right...

Bender: (To Claire) Well...it wouldn't have anything to do with you activites people being assholes now would it?

Claire: Well you wouldn't know...you don't know any of us.

Bernia: Oh, well look who's talking you redhead cunt!

Claire glares at Bernia.

Bernia: I'd seen many girls like you come and go all before "princess". You're all the same, you just insult anybody like Bender, Brian or Allison that try to make themselves known or try something new and you shit all over them just to stroke your own bullshit ego! So don't even try to play the victim!

Claire: Fuck off!

Brian really looks at Bernia and wonders why would she defend him, not that he didn't mind or anything but he wondered what did she have against Claire? What was the reason and why?

Bender: (To Claire) Well, I don't know any lepers either, but I'm not gonna run out and join one of there fucking clubs.

Andrew: Hey, lets watch the mouth huh?

Brian: I'm in the physics club too...

Bender: (To Claire) Excuse me. (To Brian) What are you babbling about?

Brian: Well, what I said was...I'm in the math club, Latin club, and Physics club...physics club.

Bender: (To Claire) Hey...Cherry...do you belong in the physics club?

Claire: That's a academic club.

Bender: So?

Claire: So, academic clubs are not the same as other clubs.

Bender: Ah, but to dorks like him (Points to Brian) they are. (To Brian) What do you guys do in your club?

Brian: In physics, um, we ah, we talk about physics...properties of physics.

Bender: So it's sorta social...demented and sad, but social. Right?

Brian: Yeah, well, I guess you can consider it a social situation. I mean there are other children in my club and uh, at the end of the year we have, um, you know, a big banquet, at the, uh, at the Hilton.

Bender: You load up, you party?

Brian: Well, no, we get dressed up...I mean, but, we don't...we don't get high.

Claire: (To Bender) Only burners like you get high...

Brian: And, uh, I didn't have any shoes. So I had to borrow my dad's. It was kinda weird 'cause my mom doesn't like me to wear other people's shoes. And, uh, my cousin Kent...my cousin Kendall from, uh, Indiana...he got high once and you know, he started eating like really weird foods. And uh, and then he just felt like he didn't belong anywhere. You know, kinda like, you know, "Twilight Zone" kinda.

Claire (Laughs at Bender) Sounds like you!

Andrew: Look, you guys keep talking and Vernon's gonna come right in here...I got a meet this Saturday and I'm not gonna miss it on the count of you boneheads...

Bernia: Takes one to know one.

Andrew glares at her.

Bender: (To Andrew mockingly) Oh yeah, and wouldn't that be a bite...(Fake moan of agony) missing a whole wrestling meet!

Bernia snickers at Bender's joke.

Andrew: Well, you wouldn't know anything about it, faggot! You've never competed in your whole life!

Bender: (With a mocked hurt expression) Oh, I know...I feel all empty inside because of it. I have such a deep admiration for guys that roll around on the floor with other guys!

Andrew: Ahhh...you'd never miss it. You don't have any goals.

Bender: Oh, but I do!

Andrew: Yeah?

Bender: I wanna be just--like--you! I figure all I need's a lobotomy and some tights!

Brian becomes interested.

Brian: You wear tights?

Andrew: (To Brian) No I don't wear tights, I wear the required uniform...

Brian: Tights...

Bernia chuckles at Brian.

Andrew: (Defensive) Shut up!

Bernia: (Whispering to Brian) That was funny.

Brian of course grins and looks down at his hands.

Bernia: Not much of a talker, are you?

Brian: Well, uh, most people think I talk too much, but, um, I guess it's, just a habit I develop for, being the brain of the school, I guess.

Bernia: You really are something Brian Johnson. I want you to know that if you need help with anything, I'm free to offer assistance in any...way...possible. Okay?

Brian:(Nervous) O-um, okay. Yeah, sure.

Bernia: Also, if you and I are gonna have any kind of "fun" together...

Bernia then puts her hand down near Brian's pants leg and slowly almost moves it to his "fly" to which Brian's eyes widen like saucers.

Bernia: ...you've got to loosen up. (Now whispering in his ear) And I'll make sure, that by the time detention's over...that you'll be mine... to... keep.

She then kisses Brian on his cheek, gets up and sits back at her original seat, leaving Brian stunned and blushing madly that would put tomatoes to shame and does a face palm. She saw this and giggled because she had him right where she wanted him.

Brian: (Sighs) This is gonna be a long 8 hours.

Bernia: (Mumbling) This is so gonna be worth the 8 hours.

Everyone then hears Vernon moving around the hall so Bender quickly comes and sits in the chair between Claire and Andrew and folds his hands on the table. Then as Vernon goes back into his office, Bender laughs and gets up. And now he starts walking towards the double doors that separate the library from the hallway.

Brian: You know, there's not supposed to be any monkey business!

Bender: (Stern voice mocking Vernon) Young man...have you finished your paper?

Bender cautiously looks outside and then messes with the screw on the door.

Andrew: Come on Bender, don't screw around!

Claire: What are you gonna do?

Andrew: Drop dead, I hope!

Vernon is out in the hallway getting a drink from the water fountain. He then stands up and checks how he looks in a fire extinguisher's mirror, does a muscular pose and mutters some manly gibberish.

Vernon: "Cobadonga"!

Back in the library, Bender is still messing with the door.

Brian: (Worried) Bender, that's, that's school property there...you know, it doesn't belong to us. It's something not to be toyed with.

The door slams shut and Bender runs back to his seat.

Andrew: That's very funny, come on, fix it!

Brian: You should really fix that.

Bender: Am I a genius?

Andrew: No, you're an asshole!

Bender: What a funny guy!

Andrew: Fix the door Bender!

Bender: Everyone just shhh!

Vernon is walking back to his office but stops when he hears Bender and Andrew arguing through the closed door.

Bender: (In the library) I've been here before, I know what I'm doing!

Andrew: (In the library) No! Fix the door, get up there and fix it!

Bender: (In library) SHUT UP!

Brian and Bernia hear Vernon in the hall.

Vernon: (In hallway) God dammit!

Vernon opens the door and storms in.

Vernon: Why is that door closed?

No one answers but just stare at Vernon.

Vernon: WHY IS THAT DOOR CLOSED!?

Bender: How are we supposed to know? We're not supposed to move right?

Vernon then turns to Claire.

Vernon: Why!?

Claire: We were just sitting here, like were supposed to...

Vernon then looks around, looks at Bender then to Brian.

Vernon: Who closed that door!?

Brian's eyes widen and mouths hangs open with intimidation. Bernia worried about him was about to say something until Bender did first.

Bender: I think the screw fell out of it...

Andrew: It just closed, sir...

Vernon now looks at Allison.

Vernon: Who!?

Allison squeaks and slams her face onto the table, hiding her head and face with her hood.

Bender: She doesn't talk, sir...

Vernon: (To Bender) Give me that screw...

Bender: I don't have it...

Vernon: You want me to yank you outta that seat and shake it out of you?

Bender: I don't have it...screws fall out all the time, the world's an imperfect place.

Bernia: No shit.

Vernon: Give it to me, Bender...

Claire: Excuse me, sir, why would anyone want to steal a screw?

Vernon: (To Claire) Watch it, young lady...

Bernia: So that way people like Vernon would not be a virgin for the rest of their natural life. Probably would fuck them while their dead, huh Vernon?

Vernon: (To Bernia) And you, you have one more time!

Vernon goes over to the door and tries to hold it open by putting a folding chair in front of it.

Bender: That door's way to heavy, sir.

Ultimately the door slams shut despite the chair.

Vernon: (In hallway) God dammit!

Everyone laughs quietly then Vernon comes back in the room.

Vernon: Andrew Clark...get up here. Come on, front and center, let's go.

Andrew then walks up to Vernon.

Bender: Hey, how come Andrew gets to get up? If he gets up, we'll get up, It'll be anarchy!

Vernon and Andrew are now moving the steel magazine rack in front of the door.

Vernon: Okay, now, watch the magazines!

Bender: It's out of my hands...

They get it into the doorway but it blocks the entire door.

Bender: That's very clever sir, but what if there's a fire? I think violating fire codes and endangering the lives of children would be unwise at this juncture of your career, sir.

Vernon thinks about it, then turns to Andrew.

Vernon: Alright, what are you doing with this? Get this outta here for God's sake! What's the matter with you? Come on!

Brian: You know the school comes equipped with fire exits at either end of the library.

Bender: (Glaring at Brian) Show Dick some respect!

Bernia: Bender you don't like him so shut up. And stop messing with Brian.

Bender: It's called sarcasm, Vixen.

Andrew and Vernon then come back to the main section of the library.

Vernon: (To Andrew) Let's go...go! Get back into your seat!

Andrew sits back down.

Vernon: (To Andrew) I expected a little more from a varsity letterman!

Andrew flips Vernon off with his finger but hides it.

Vernon: (To Bender) You're not fooling anybody, Bender! The next screw that falls out is gonna be you!

Bender: (Mumbles) Eat my shorts...

Vernon: What was that!?

Bender: (Loudly) Eat. My. Shorts!

Vernon: You just brought yourself another Saturday, mister!

Bender: Oh, Christ...I'm crushed.

Vernon: You just bought one more right there!

Bender: Well, I'm free the Saturday after that...beyond that, I'm gonna have to check my calendar!

Vernon: Good! Because it's gonna be filled, we'll keep going! You want another one? Say the word, just say the word! Instead of prison, you'll come here! Are you through?

Bender: No!

Vernon: I'm doing society a favor!

Bender: So?!

Vernon: That's another one right now! I've got you for the rest of your natural born life if you don't watch your step! You want another one?

Bender: Yes!

Vernon: You got it! You got another one right there! That's another one pal!

Claire:( To Bender worried) Cut it out!

Bender looks at her.

Claire: (Mouthing) Stop!

Vernon: (To Bender) You through?

Bernia: Bender, come on!

Bender: (To Vernon) Not even close, bud!

Vernon: Good! You got one more, right there!

Bender: Do you really think I give a shit?

Vernon: Another...

Bender and Vernon glare at each other.

Vernon: You through?

Bender: How many is that?

Brian: That's seven including the one when we first came in and you asked Mr. Vernon here whether Barry Manilow knew he raided his closet.

Vernon: (To Bender) Now that's eight! (To Brian) You stay out of this!

Brian: Excuse me, sir, it's seven...

Vernon: (To Brian) Shut up, peewee!

Bernia: (To Vernon) Don't yell at him!

Vernon turns to Bernia now. Brian again looks at Bernia as she defended him again.

Vernon: You want the same amount of detentions as Bender? Because I can give them to you!

Bernia: Lick me...

Vernon: You got it! You and Bender! And just for that, Johnson's gonna be joining you both for those seven Saturdays!

Bernia: Why are you such a wanker!?

Vernon: Don't test me!

Bernia: Asshole!

Vernon then turns back to Bender and makes a Hook 'em Horns sign at him.

Vernon: You're mine Bender. For two months I've got you and those other two. I gotcha! I gotcha!

Bender: What can I say? I'm thrilled!

Vernon: Oh, I'm sure that's exactly what you want these people to believe. You know something, Bender? You ought to spend a little more time trying to do something with yourself and a little less time trying to impress people. You might be better off. (To everyone) Alright, that's it! I'm going to be right outside those doors. The next time I hafta come in here...I'm cracking skulls! Bender: (Mockingly mouthing Vernon's words) I'm cracking skulls!

Vernon turns around to exit the library and closes the door.

Bender: FUCK YOU!

Vernon stops in his tracks near the door. Wanting to go back in and tear Bender apart, but he knew that's what Bender wanted. Instead, he exhaled and walked away.

Bender: (In the library mumbles) Fuck!

Bernia looks at Brian with a sad face, realizing she earned herself and Brian the same amount of Saturday detentions as Bender has.

Bernia: (Mouthing to Brian) Sorry...

Brian: (Mouthing back) No, it's fine. Thank you.

Bernia smiles at Brian and they stare at each other before breaking eye content.


	4. TBCR: Chapter Four.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The kids try to know one another (Aside from Bender), Brian and Bernia connect more and she puts Bender and Andrew in check.

The clock now reads a quarter to eight. Everyone was bored no doubt about it. Bender is lighting his shoe on fire but then lights his cigarette from the flame on his shoe. Claire is leaning on the table with her arm out and hand on her cheek just staring into space thinking. Brian has his hands down trying to "play it off" so he puts his hat down on his lap then puts his head down on the table. Bernia is fixing the biker vest on her chest, zipping the zipper up and down and then decides to take it off revealing a t-shirt that reads "Exciter, Long Live The Loud." Andrew is playing with the strings on his sweatshirt pulling them back and fourth along with his head turning back and fourth. Allison pulls out a piece of string and stares at it. Bender taps on his shoe to put out that small flame. Allison now is wrapping the string around her finger making it turn purple. Bender then starts playing air-guitar. Allison is drawing one of her pictures. Andrew is playing paper football and cheers silently. Allison now is shaking dandruff onto her drawing as if it was blending in with the drawing like glitters of snow. Bender then starts to fall asleep putting his folded hands and head back on the chair with his feet still on the table. Brian drops his pencil and falls asleep, Bernia falls asleep by putting her head on the table where Brian is sitting. Allison puts her chin down on her hands and closes her eyes. Andrew goes to sleep and Claire finally after daydreaming is the last to sleep. Then later, Vernon comes in and looks at them sleeping.

Vernon: Wake up!

Nobody moves at all.

Vernon: Who has to go to the lavatory?

Everyone raises their hands.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Now the clock reads 10:22. Andrew is stretching his leg on part of the railing, Claire sitting down, Brian and Bernia are talking to each other right behind Bender who is ripping pages out of a book and throwing them around that one of the pages flies on Andrew and another one falls down on Claire's table.

Andrew: That's real intelligent.

Bender: You're right...it's wrong to destroy literature...

He continues to tear out pages.

Bender: It's such fun to read...and, Molet really pumps my nads!

Claire: (Correcting Bender) Moliere.

Bender looks at her as Claire smiles and bites her lip.

Brian: I love his work.

Bender throws the rest of pages at Brian with them almost hitting Bernia as well. Claire turns away smiling.

Bernia: (Sarcasm) Nice Bender. You know, Brian can teach you a thing or two about "actually" reading...

Brian looks at her and she smiles at him in return.

Bender: Big deal...nothing to do when you're locked in a vacancy.

Andrew: Speak for yourself...

Bender: Do you think I'd speak for you? I don't even know your language!

Andrew turns to Claire and Brian and Bernia are talking quietly as Bender takes out the card catalog drawer taking the cards out.

Bernia: So, Brian...you doing anything later? When detention's over, I mean.

Brian: Um, well, not really except, you know, my mom wants me to study. She's kinda always on my back about my grades, and stuff, you know.

Bernia: Can you tutor me? I could use help with my studies.

Brian: Um, W-where do you live?

Bernia: (Seductive) Oh, moving quite fast aren't we?

Brian: No no, not like that I mean to j-

Bernia: (Giggles) Relax Bri. Now is not the time for that. (That...comes later, in time.) For now you can just guide me through things you know because I have a hard time, especially considering the fact that I'm all brains as well.

Brian: Well, I guess we could learn from each other.

Bernia: With pleasure...

Bender rolls his eyes at Bernia, he wondered what did she see in a brainiac like Brian anyway but learned to let go and starts pushing cards back in the drawer.

Andrew: (To Claire) Hey, you grounded tonight?

Claire shrugs her shoulders.

Claire: I don't know, my mom said I was but my dad told me to just blow her off.

Andrew turns around to Bender who looks back at him then turns back to Claire.

Andrew: Big party at Stubbies, parents are in Europe. Should be pretty wild...

Claire: Yeah?

Andrew: Yeah, can you come?

Claire: I doubt it...

Andrew: How come?

Claire: Well' cause if I do what my mom tells me not to do, it's because my father tells me it's okay. There's like this whole big monster deal, it's endless and it's a drag. It's like any minute... Divorce...

Bender: Who do you like better?

Claire: What?

Bender: You like your old man better than your mom?

Claire: They're both strict.

Bender: No, I mean, if you had to choose between them?

Claire: I don't know. I'd probably go live with my brother. I mean, I don't think either of them gives a shit about me...it's like they use me to get back at each other.

Allison: (Loudly) HA!!!

Everyone looks at Allison now. Claire glaring, Bender with a blank stare, Andrew with a wide smirk, Brian in confusion and Bernia in wonder.

Bernia: Allison, I think that's the first time you spoke in a while...

Allison then blows her hair out of her eyes and grins looking around.

Claire: (To Allison) Shut up!

Andrew: You're just feeling sorry for yourself...

Claire: Yeah, well if I didn't nobody else would.

Andrew: Aw...you're breaking my heart...

Bender: Sporto...

Andrew: What?

Bender gets down of the railing.

Bender: You get along with your parents?

Andrew: Well if I say yes, I'm a idiot, right?

Bender then hops over the railing to be in Andrew's face.

Bender: You're an idiot anyway...but if you say you get along with you're parents, well you're a liar too.

Bender turns and walks away from him with Claire smirking and Brian knowing an argument was about to happen, again. Andrew walks up to Bender and pushes him from his back.

Andrew: You know something, man...if we weren't in school right now, I'd waste you!

Bender points his middle finger to the floor.

Bender: Can you hear this? Want me to turn it up?

Bender is now giving Andrew the bird.

Bernia: (Mumbles) Oh great, more arguing...

Brian walks over and put his hands on both there shoulders trying to break them up.

Brian: Hey fellas, I mean...

Andrew pushes Brian's hand away, so does Bender and Bernia walks up to Brian to save him from Andrew's and Bender's arguing. They both sit on the middle table.

Bernia: I think you should just let these 2 "macho men" handle it themselves. My parents and I get along, but sometimes we have our off days and usual shit. What about you Brian? You get along with you're folks, right?

Brian: Well, um, my dad and little sister I do but, see, my mom is kinda, let's just say her parental compassion is just, you know, wacko.

Bernia: (Worried) I'm sorry I asked...

Brian: No, it's fine you know. I mean, it's just complicated that's all. Although it's kinda a one-sided argument when she's yelling and, you know, I try to say my piece but she ignores it.

Bender: (To Brian) Dork?

Brian: Yeah?

Bender: You are a parent's wet dream, okay?

Bernia: (Glaring at Bender) Bender...

Bender shrugs his shoulders and walks away.

Brian: Well that's the problem...

Bender: Look, I can see you getting all bunged up for them making wear these kinda clothes. But face it, you're a Neo-Maxi-Zoom-Dweebie! What would you be doing if you weren't out making yourself a better citizen?

Bernia: Bender!

Bender: What?

Bernia: Would you stop?

Andrew: Yeah, why do you have to insult everybody?

Bender: (To Andrew) I'm being honest asshole! I would expect you...to know the difference!

Andrew: Yeah well, he's got a name!

Bender: Yeah?

Andrew: Yeah! (To Brian) What's you're name?

Bernia looks at Andrew in disbelief.

Bernia: Are you serious?

Brian: Brian.

Andrew: (To Bender) See?

Bernia: (Shakes her head) Oh God...

Bender: (To Brian) My condolences...

Bender then pats Brian on the chest hard then walks away to where Claire is sitting.

Bernia: Sorry about Bender. He's like the little brother I never had.

Brian: It's okay. You know, your name Bernia...it's a goth name but, um, it has a meaning.

Bernia: Really?

Brian nods.

Bernia: What does it mean?

Brian: Uh, A- angel in amour. Although amour means either a secret or illicit love affair or lover. Although, I would uh, replace it with the word armor...you know, to describe you better.

Bernia smiles at Brian.

Bernia: (Softly) Thank you Brian...you're really sweet. You know that?

Brian smiles back at her then looks down again, then Bernia caresses his cheek making him look at her again.

Claire: (To Bender) What's you're name?

Bender: What's yours?

Claire: Claire.

Bender: Ka-Laire?

Claire: Claire...it's a family name!

Bender: No...it's a fat girl's name!

Claire: Well thank you...

Bender: You're welcome...

Claire: I'm not fat!

Bender: Well not a present but I could see you pushing maximum density! You see, I'm not sure if you know this...but there are two kinds of fat people. There's fat people that were born to be fat, and then there's fat people that were once thin but they became fat...so when you look at them you sorta see that thin person inside! You see, you're gonna get married, you're gonna squeeze out a few puppies and then, uh...

Bender mimics becoming fat by making noises. Claire gives Bender the finger.

Bender: Oh...obscene finger gestures from such a pristine girl!

Claire: (Resentfully) I'm not that pristine!

Bender bends down closer to Claire.

Bender: Are you a virgin? I'll bet a million dollars that you are! Let's end the suspense! Is it gonna be...a white wedding?

Claire: Why don't you just shut up?

Bender: Have you ever kissed a boy on the mouth? Have you ever been felt up? Over the bra, under the blouse, shoes off...hoping to God you're parents don't walk in?

Claire is now getting upset.

Claire: Do you want me to puke?

Bender: Over the panties, no bra, blouse unbuttoned, Calvin's in a ball on the front seat past eleven on a school night?

Now Andrew, Brian and Bernia get uncomfortable hearing all this.

Andrew: Leave her alone!

Bender slowly stands and faces Andrew.

Andrew: I said leave her alone!

Bender: You gonna make me?

Andrew: Yeah...

Bender walks over to Andrew.

Bender: You and how many of your friends?

Andrew: Just me, just you and me. Two hits. Me hitting you, you hitting the floor! Anytime you're ready pal!

Bender smirks then turns to walk but not after attempting to slap him, but Andrew grabs both his arms and brings him down with a wrestling move. They start struggling trying to one up each other.

Bernia: Bender! Andrew!

Bender: I don't wanna get into this with you man...

Andrew gets up.

Andrew: Why not?

Bender now gets up.

Bender: Cause I'd kill you...it's real simple. I'd kill you and your fucking parents would sue me and would be a big mess and I don't care enough about you to bother.

Andrew: You fuc-

Bernia then steps between them and grabs them both by one ear applying hard pressure.

Bender: OW!

Andrew: Hey, OW!

Bernia: Listen, and listen good! You two idiots are not gonna get us in more trouble as we already are! Now if you two don't stop this bullshit I will not hesitate to rip your ears clean off, and I can be a real serious bitch when I don't get what I want!

Bender: No doubt about th-

Before Bender could finish, Bernia twists his ear putting more pressure on his ear.

Bernia: Shut up! And don't think you're off the hook either Andrew. How about you stop being dense and actually use you brain and stop trying to impress people! Now I'm gonna let go, and when I do, you two better learn to get along for your own sakes! Understand?

They don't answer right away so she twists both ears.

Bender: OW!

Andrew: OW! Knock it off!

Bernia: Understand!?

They both nod and she lets go.

Bender: (To Andrew) You're lucky she held me Sporto. Real...fucking lucky.

Andrew: Chicken shit...

Bender heard him and as Andrew walks away, Bender takes out a switchblade and opens it making a click sound for everyone to hear and everyone turns to him.

Bernia: Bender! Put that away...

He doesn't do it.

Bernia: Put the fucking blade away!

Andrew waits for Bender to make his move, Bender stands there with Bernia still glaring at him and then decides to give in and stabs the blade into the chair next to him which was also next to where Allison is sitting. Allison then takes the switchblade and puts it in her bag as they're talking.

Andrew: Why put it away? Let's end this right now. You don't talk to her...you don't look at her, and you don't even think about her! You understand me?

Bender: I'm trying to help her...

Andrew looks at him, like really looks at him as if he really believes insulting Claire is his way of help.


	5. TBCR: Chapter Five.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bender of course still bothering people, Vernon being a dick, Andrew and Allison talk while the other four speak in which Bernia really pushes herself towards Brian.

Few minutes later, everyone sits quietly. Bernia continues to sit next to Brian and they start talking.

Brian: Hey, you okay?

Bernia: Yeah. Just pissed off at Bender and Andrew.

Brian: Sorry...

Bernia: Don't be. It's not you I'm mad at, not that you could ever make me. You're too cute.

Brian smiles at her and she smiles back. She then puts her hand on top of his.

Bernia: Brian, I feel there's this connection between us and, honestly, I think you're the only person I can trust in here. Not that I don't trust Bender it's just well, Bender is Bender. Allison I can probably also trust if I get to know her better, but I don't know about Claire and Andrew. But you, you're someone I feel I can always count on...and that, I can tell you everything about me.

Brian: Really?

Bernia nods.

Brian: Bernia, I-

Before Brian could say anything else, the school janitor Carl walks in.

Carl: Brian, how you doing?

Brian waves back at him.

Bender: Your dad work here?

Embarrassed, Brian slumps down in his seat and Bernia glares at Bender.

Bernia: (Mouthing to Bender) Shut the fuck up!

Bender rolls his eyes at her.

Bender: Uh, Carl?

Carl: What?

Bender: Can I ask you a question?

Carl: Sure...

Bender: How does one become a janitor?

Carl: You wanna be a janitor?

Bender: No, I just wanna know how one becomes and janitor because Andrew here, is very interested in pursuing a career in custodial arts...

Carl: Oh, really? You guys think I'm some untouchable peasant? Peon? Huh? Maybe so, but following a broom around after shitheads like you for the past eight years I've learn a couple of things...I look through your letters, I look through your lockers...I listen to your conversations, you don't know that but I do...I'm the eyes and ears of this institution my friends. By the way, that clock's twenty minutes fast!

Everyone groans while Bender grins and laughs.

Brian: (Looking at his watch) Shit!

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

The clock now say 11:30. Vernon gets up and leaves. Meanwhile in the library, Bender is whistling, then Brian and everyone then starts joining whistling a marching band tune. Brian, Bernia, Claire, Andrew and Allison stop when Vernon enters but Bender continues by now whistling Beethoven's 5th.

Vernon: Alright girls, that's thirty minutes to lunch...

Andrew: Here?

Vernon: Here...

Andrew: Well, I think the cafeteria would be a more suitable place for us to eat lunch, sir!

Vernon: Well, I don't care what you think, Andrew!

Bender: (To Vernon) Uh, Dick? Excuse me, Rich...will milk be made available for us?

Andrew: We're extremely thirsty sir...

Claire: I have a very low tolerance for dehydration.

Andrew: I've seen her dehydrate sir, it's gross.

Bender; Relax, I'll get it!

Bender stands.

Vernon: Ah, ah, ah, grab some wood there bub!

Bender sits back down.

Bernia: You would know all about "grabbing wood" wouldn't you RDV?

Vernon: (To Bernia) Shut up. (To Bender) And you, what did you think, I was born yesterday? You think I'm gonna have you roaming these halls?

Vernon walks closer.

Vernon: (Pointing to Andrew) You!

Andrew then points to Claire who is also trying to get out of the library but Vernon ends up picking Allison.

Vernon: And you! Hey! What's her name? Wake her! Wake her up! (To Allison) Come on, on your feet missy! Let's go! This is no rest home!

Allison gets up.

Vernon: There's a soft drink machine in the teacher's lounge. Let's go!

Andrew walks pass Allison who stops to look only to move again. Andrew goes to Brian and asks for a couple of dollars which Brian obliges to.

Vernon: Come on! Shake a tell feather...let's go, hurry up! Some people don't even get a lunch hour.

Andrew asks Bender for money, but Bender sticks hand out to Brian who hi-fives it.

Vernon: Come on, Hayanaga!

Bender glares at Brian, Brian confused realizing now laughs and face palms himself rolling his eyes and gives the money for Bender to Andrew. Bernia giggles at Brian's cuteness.

Claire: Excuse me sir? um, can you break this?

Claire holds up a 50 dollar bill. Vernon huffs at Claire and shakes his head.

Andrew and Allison are now walking in the hallway.

Andrew: So, what's your poison?

Allison doesn't answer.

Andrew: What do you drink?

Still no answer from her.

Andrew: Okay...forget I asked...

Allison: Vodka...

Andrew: Vodka? When do you drink Vodka?

Allison: Whenever...

Andrew: A lot?

Allison: (Smiling) Tons...

Andrew: Is that why you're here?

Allison again does not answer.

Andrew: Why are you here?

Allison: Why are you here?

They stop walking and Andrew leans on the wall.

Andrew: Um, I'm here today...because uh, because my coach and my father don't want me to blow my ride. See I get treated differently because uh, Coach thinks I'm a winner. So does my old man. I'm not a winner because I wanna be one...I'm a winner because I got strength and speed. Kinda like a race horse. That's about how involved I am in what's happening to me.

Allison: Yeah? That's very interesting. Now why don't you tell me why you're really here?

Andrew: Forget it!

Andrew then keeps walking.

Back in the library, Bender, Claire, Brian and Bernia are all waiting for the cokes.

Bender: Claire...you wanna see a picture of a guy with elephantitus to the nuts? It's pretty tasty...

Claire looks away disgusted.

Claire: No thank you...

Bender: How do you think he rides a bike?

Claire felt like she was going to gag.

Bender: Oh, Claire, Bernia...would you two ever consider dating a guy like this?

Bernia: (Sarcasm) You're hilarious...

Claire: (To Bender) Can you just leave me alone?

Bender: I mean if he had a great personality and was a real good dancer and had a real cool car...Although you'd probably have to ride in the backseat 'cause his nuts would ride shotgun.

Claire: You know what I wish I was doing?

Bender: Op, watch what you say, (Pointing to Brian) Brian here is a cherry.

Brian nervously looks at Bender then looks down, Bernia notices this and stands up.

Claire: Wish I was on a plane...to France.

Brian: Bender?

Bender: What dorky?

Brian: W-what do you mean by cherry? I uh, don't, I don't get it.

Bender: When have you ever gotten laid?

Bernia looks at Brian.

Brian: Oh, well uh, (Clears throat) I think that the answer's, already pretty obvious.

Bender: So you admit you're a cherry?

Brian: By cherry, you mean virgin, then yeah.

Bender: Wow. You're pathetic dork!

Bernia glares at Bender and Claire listens to the conversation.

Brian: Well, it's something that I can't help...I mean, now I can but, you can't expect to be born in the world not a virgin. So uh, I mean I never was told the talk by my parents. I guess I'm to blame for that because I'd never asked. You know?

Bender: See Brian, you're gonna be one of those guys that grows up all alone, some years later you'll have cats in your apartment and then decide to get your kitty freak on. (Mocks meow). I don't even think you'll ever experience holding hands or kissing a girl, unless it's your mommy.

Bernia: Bender, do you ever "not" use their short-comings against them? Jesus Christ!

Bender: Relax there, mixture. I'm just asking the man here a legitimate question! So Brian, why had you never had slipped a girl the injection? You faggot?

Brian: No...

Bender: You a prude?

Brian: No...

Claire: (Glaring at Brian) Or are you a pig?

The three look at her.

Bernia: Claire!

Claire: Well, he could be lying! All men are pigs, even nerds! So Brian, how bout it?

Brian: (Nervous) No! I'm not a pervert! I mean, I thought about it but I'm not that kind of person. I never denied that I was a virgin because if I lied, I would've made it worse and you girls would, probably think I was like Bender...

Claire fixes her face from glaring at Brian.

Claire: (To Brian with guilt) Sorry.

Brian nods.

Bender: You know dork, the fact that you and people like you have never gotten laid is a shame for men everywhere. I mean, do you have any idea? Why do you have to say for yourself?

Brian: Excuse me for being a virgin...And I'm sorry?

Bender stares at him a shakes his head. Brian felt like he had just lost his manhood.

Claire laughs.

Bernia: Bender, you asshole...

Bender: Well I can't help it if Johnson's sex life sucks! That's the way it is!

Claire: (To Brian) No, Brian look I'm sorry. But, why didn't you me or Bernia to know you were a virgin?

Brian stays silent looking down.

Claire: Brian! Why didn't you want us to know you were a virgin?

Brian: No again, I never denied it but, it's just well, it's hard to live with that. You know? Being left out in a dark place trying to figure sex by yourself...it sucks. I mean there are times where I try to really handle that situation but, uh, most times it's easier said then done. And I won't lie because there are also times where I do try and keep it to myself but, when people look at me, it's pretty much written all over me that I am that person that's never experienced that feeling yet. I mean I know it's supposed to be personal and private business but, still.

Bender: Well Brian, it doesn't sound like you're doing any business...

Bernia walks up to Brian and rubs his back making him feel better.

Claire: (To Brian) I think it's okay for a guy to be a virgin...

Bender, Brian and Bernia look at her again, surprised.

Brian: You do?

Claire looks away from Bender and nods at Brian smiling.

Bernia: Really Brian, don't sweat it. I'm still a virgin too.

Now Brian, Bender and now Claire were surprised.

Brian: You are?

Bernia: (Nodding) Yeah.

Bender: Wait a minute! When you first came in here, you said that you're ex-boyfriend didn't live up to his standards!

Bernia: Well, we were going to have sex but then I found out...

Bernia points her pinky finger up, moves it down along with her hand making noises from the arcade game Pac-Man as if her ex's privates were not functional.

Bernia: (Mocking voice of her ex) My sperm had fallen, and it can't get up! It's cold!

Brian and Claire laugh while Bender smirks widely. Bernia looks to Bender, then looks back at Brian smiling very evil like.

Bernia: But Brian?

Brian: Hmmm?

Bernia walks now in front of Brian.

Bernia: (Seductive) You look like the type that's really good in the sack...

Bender and Claire look at Bernia with eyes gawking. Brian even looked pale hearing what she said.

Brian: (Shocked) What?

Bernia: (Seductive) Well, you are right? I'll bet a million dollars that says you are...

Bender: (Mouthing to Claire) She's saying what I said to you!

Claire is holding back her laughing.

Bernia: (Seductive) Let's end the suspense. Is there something "down there" a reason why you're last name is Johnson?

Brian: I-I-I'm not really uh, s-sure that uh...

Bernia: (Seductive) Have you ever thought of me? Me and you somewhere alone, where no one would bother us? And you're just dying to fuck me? To dominate me into submission and I do the same? Ever thought about licking my pussy?

Brian: Uh, I-I- um...

Bernia: (Seductive) You thought of me naked Brian? You ever imagined what would I look like in the raw and all? You ever thought about me, grinding on you back and fourth making you have a boner the minute you feel my body? Have you ever thought about me taking a "hold" of you and sucking you dry, releasing everything? Then ravaging me? Grabbing and pulling my hair with me telling you to make me your bitch? I bet that'll be wonders for both of us Brian. I want you to think about that for as long as you please...because eventually, you might get what you'd begged for.

Bernia then licks Brian's ear and strokes his hair before sitting down in her seat, leaving Brian covering his mouth with his hand, red and all. Bender and Claire look at Brian and laugh uncontrollably at him. Brian looks at both of them then at Bernia who winks at him making him cover up his smile with his knee.


	6. TBCR: Chapter Six.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> During lunch, Bender gets a little personal about families.

Later, Andrew and Allison enter back in the library from getting six cans of Coke. Everybody now has their lunches. Claire begins to take hers out of a small shopping bag.

Bender: What's in there?

Claire: Guess. Where's your lunch?

Bender: You're wearing it...

Claire: You're nauseating...

Bender grabs one can of Coke, tosses it to Allison who catches it without even looking up. Bender then watches Claire set up a sushi platter.

Bender: What's that?

Claire: Sushi...

Bender: Sushi?

Claire: Rice, uh, raw fish and seaweed.

Bender: You won't accept a guy's tongue in your mouth and you're gonna eat that?

Claire: Can I eat?

Bender: I don't know...give it a try...

Andrew now takes out a couple of sandwiches, a bag of potato chips, an apple, a banana, a bag of cookies and a carton of milk. Allison opens her soda and it fizzes over. She loudly slurps is off the table and her fingers. While taking out his lunch, Andrew sees Bender looking at him.

Andrew: (To Bender) What's your problem?

Allison opens her sandwich and tosses the meat up with it landing on the sculpture above her. She then opens up some pixie sticks and pours the sugar on the sandwich and then puts Cap' n Crunch on top of that. She crushes the sandwich together and loudly eats it. Claire, Andrew, Bender, Brian and Bernia though look at her in the process but she pays no mind. Bender looks over to Bernia to see what she's having, grabs 2 cans of Coke and walks over to her.

Bender: So, whatcha got there vixen?

Bernia: (Sarcasm) You're gonna judge me aren't you?

Bender: I don't know, depends what you eating...

Bernia raises an eyebrow but decides to show what's she's got. She takes out aluminum foil all wrapped up, takes it off and reveals her lunch is chicken along with French Fries. Then takes out a bowl of Macaroni & Cheese and a piece of carrot cake wrapped in plastic.

Bernia: Weird enough for ya?

Bender: No, that actually looks good. Honest.

Bernia: Thank you...

Bender: Unless of course, you have a fetish eating disorder.

Bernia glares at Bender.

Bender: What?

Bernia: Am I going to have to "bend" off your ear again?

Bender: Okay, okay. Sorry. Here's your Coke.

Bender gives her the soda, walks away not wanting to have his ear in pain again as Bernia smirks in victory. Bender now walks over to Brian, takes his bag of lunch, gives him the other Coke and sits down.

Bender: What're we having?

Brian: Uh, it's your standard, regular lunch I guess...

Bender reaches in the bag and pulls out a thermos. He sets it on the table and points to it.

Bender: Milk?

Brian: Soup.

Bender reaches in again. Brian goes for his bag but Bender slaps his hand away. Bender then finally pulls out a juice box.

Brian: That's apple juice...

Bender: I can read! PB&J with the crusts cut off...

Claire, Andrew and Bernia takes a look.

Bender: Well Brian, this is a very nutritious lunch, all the food groups are represented. Did your mom marry Mr. Rogers?

Brian: Uh, no, Mr. Johnson...

Bender: Ah...

Andrew and Claire smile at each other, but Bernia gave Bender a look because of where this was going.

Bender: Here's my impression of life at big Bri's house...

Bender stands and walks in the middle of the two middle tables. Everyone looks.

Bender: (Loud voice) Son?

(Kiddie voice) Yeah Dad?

(Loud voice) How's your day pal?

(Kiddie voice) Great Dad, how's your?

(Loud voice) Super! Say son, how'd you like to go fishing this weekend?

(Kiddie voice) Great Dad, but I've got homework to do!

(Loud voice) That's alright son, you can do it, on the boat!

(Kiddie voice) Geee!!!

(Loud voice) Dear, isn't our son swell?

(Quiet and motherly voice) Yes Dear, isn't life swell?

Bender mimes Brian's mother kissing the father then his father kissing him mother and then the father punching the mother in the face. And suddenly it's not so funny anymore. Andrew, Claire, Allison and Bernia all look at Brian who felt really hurt by Bender's assumption of his life at home. Brian took a hard long swallow and felt like he was gonna cry, but instead just wiped his face with both hands and covered his mouth.

Bernia: Goddamn you Bender...that shit is not funny! It never has been funny, never was, and it never will be funny!

Bender: So what? What you see with me is what you get!

Andrew looks at Brian then at Bender.

Andrew: Alright, what about your family?

Bender: Oh, mine?

Andrew: Yeah.

Bender: That's real easy!

Bender stands again and points forward.

Bender: (As his father) Stupid, worthless, no good, Goddamned, freeloading, son of a bitch, retarded, bigmouth, know it all, asshole, jerk!

(As his mother) You forgot ugly, lazy and disrespectful.

Bender slams his hand to slap his invisible mother.

(As his father) Shut up bitch! Go fix me a turkey pot pie!

(As himself) What about you Dad?

(As his father) Fuck you!

(As himself) No, Dad, what about you?

(As his father) Fuck you!

(As himself) No, Dad, what about you!?

(As his father) FUCK YOU!

Bender reaches out and pretends he's his father hitting him. Claire looks as if she's scared of him.

Brian breaks his silence.

Brian: (Nervous) Is, is that for real?

Bender blows his hair out of his face.

Bender: (To Brian) You wanna come over sometime?

Andrew: That's bullshit! It's all part of your image, I don't believe a word of it!

Bender actually looks hurt.

Bender: You don't believe me?

Andrew: No...

Bender: No?

Andrew: Did I stutter?

Bender walks over to Andrew and lifts up his right shirt sleeve to reveal a circular shaped burn.

Bender: Do you believe this?

Andrew and Claire take a look and they both look away but Bender shoves it in Andrew's face.

Bender: It's about the size of a cigar...Do I stutter? You see, this is what you get in my house when you spill paint in the garage. See I don't think I need to sit with you fucking dildos anymore!

Bender walks away right over to the map table, yells in anger and throws the maps on the ground. Climbs on top of the table and then up the second floor balcony. He bends to his knees with both hands crossed holding a rail, angry and hurt at once.

Claire: (To Andrew) You shouldn't have said that!

Andrew: How would I know? I mean, he lies about everything anyway!

Bernia looks at Andrew and Claire, then at Bender and finally to Brian. She then walks over to him and sits.

Bernia: Brian...?

Brian looks over to her but doesn't say anything.

Bernia: Look, I'm not saying what Bender did was right at all, Bender is Bender. Although from the looks of that mark on his arm he was not lying.

Brian: Well, he was right about one thing...I am a parent's wet dream. Is my life really that pathetic and useless? I feel like I'm expendable, you know? I-I, I don't know...I really don't know.

Bernia felt like she was gonna cry but she then looks at Brian and this time she hugs him as Brian takes a hold of her arm and Bernia lays her head on the back of his neck.


	7. TBCR: Chapter Seven.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bernia and Bender have a heart to heart talk. They go in the halls avoiding Vernon and even more drama.

Meanwhile, Vernon was in his office. He puts a orange into his mouth and then tries to pour coffee out of his thermos. The top comes off and the coffee goes all over his desk.

Vernon: Oh, shit!

Back in the library, everyone was silent. Bender was still on the balcony, and everyone was still sitting, until Bernia got up from sitting next to Brian.

Bernia: Brian?

Brian: Hmmm?

Bernia: I'll be back okay?

Bernia starts walking to where Bender is by going up the stairs of the balcony. She gets there and see's Bender still on his knees.

Bernia: Bender?

Bender: What?

Bernia: Look, can we talk?

Bender: We're talking aren't we?

Bernia: Look, when are you gonna stop this?

Bender: Stop what?

Bernia: This! This game that you're playing with everyone? Huh?

Bender: I never play...

Bernia: Well neither do I.

Bender: Look here VixMix, how do you expect me to be? All happy go lucky and all that other shit? I'm not gonna pretend there's something to be happy about unless it's at someone's expense.

Bernia rolls her eyes.

Bender: Oh, I see, it's about your little dweeb of a boyfriend isn't it?

Bernia: He's not a dweeb Bender! What you said hurted him!

Bender: So?

Bernia: So you're assuming what kind of life he has!

Bender: The truth hurts doesn't it?

Bernia shakes her head at him.

Bernia: Look, just because whatever goes on in life at your home does not give you the right to mock other lives. And I didn't wanna bring this up but I will. You keep this up Bender...you'll be just like Vernon.

Bender stands up and glares at her getting close to her then points his finger at her face.

Bender: Don't ever....compare me to that piece of shit!

Bernia: (Taking Bender's words) The truth hurt, don't it? Look, don't become like that asshole out there! Just once, do something for everyone except yourself will ya?

Bender: Why do you even care?

Bernia: Because I want to and will always do!

Bender: I mean about Brian...

This caught Bernia off guard...

Bernia: Because...

It takes her awhile to answer.

Bender: Ironic huh? You flirted with him, yet you can't answer why you like him. Or is it more then that?

Bernia: He's not like other guys...Not like the guys that would be all macho and that bullshit. He actually cares about people's feelings and doesn't do it for perverted reasons. If you only knew Bender, there was time when I was not like this...

Bender: What? Really hot?

Bernia nods. Bender seems to understand.

Bender: So you like him because he's not a badass?

Bernia: It's foolish bravado, Bender.

Bender: Well, rather be a fool then a tool.

Bernia looks at Bender.

Bender: Look, if you want me to apologize to the geek I will. But don't expect us to being all buddy buddy and all.

Bernia: I don't. I expect you to be better then Vernon.

Bender: I am!

Bernia: Then prove it...

Bernia then walks away from Bender and leaves him with a choice. Afterwards, he comes down and walks to everyone.

Bender: So, shitheads? Ready to go out?

Andrew: Out where?

Bender: To my locker...

Claire: Bender, not this again!

Bender: It'll be fun! Come one people, you don't know what you'll be missing.

Everyone looks at each other for a minute then back at Bender who smirks.

After cleaning his desk, Vernon puts his suit on and walks out in the hallway talking to himself.

Vernon: Coffee...looks like they scraped it off from the bottom of the Mississippi river. Everything's polluted, everything's polluted...the coffee.

Bender comes out of the library doors followed by everyone else. Bender and Claire are walking next to each other, Brian and Andrew are walking next to each other, and at the end of the line, Bernia and Allison are walking next to each other following.

Claire: (To Bender) How do know where Vernon went?

Bender: I don't...

Claire: Well then, how do you know when he'll be back?

Bender: I don't...being bad feels pretty good, huh?

Brian: (To Andrew) What's the point of going in Bender's locker?

Andrew: Beats me...

Brian: This is so stupid...what do you think, why are we risking getting caught?

Andrew: I don't know...

Brian: So then what are we doing?

Andrew: You ask me one more question and I'm beating the shit out of you!

Brian: Sorry...

Bernia (To Andrew) And no, you will not. Keep walking!

Brian looks back at her.

Brian: (Mouthing) Thanks.

Bernia: (Mouthing back) Don't mention it.

They all get to his locker and Bernia see's the word FAG on his locker and shakes her head.

Bender: (To Bernia) What?

Bernia: (Pointing at the word FAG) Nice...

Bender: Unbelievable...

Bender opens his locker and it's a mess.

Andrew: Slob!

Bender: My maid's on vacation.

Bender pulls out a giant paper bag, which is in another paper bag until reaching the smallest paper bag, to finally pull out a bag of marijuana.

Brian: Drugs...

Andrew: Screw that Bender...put it back!

Bender closes his locker, says nothing and walks away.

Brian: Drugs...the boy had marijuana.

Claire walks after Bender in a daze.

Brian: That was marijuana!

Andrew: Shut up!

Andrew follows the other two. Brian looks at Bernia who smirks, and Allison who stands there with her mouth open.

Brian: Do you two approve of this?

Bernia chuckles at Brian and walks up to him, now holding his cheeks.

Bernia: Come on! It's not so bad.

She then kisses the tip of his nose and walks. Brian looks at her with gawking eyes with his arms and hands out, then sighs in surrender but not before looking at Allison one more time then walking away. Allison steals the lock off Bender's locker. Now they're all walking down the hall.

Bender: We'll cross through the lab, then we'll double back.

Andrew: You better be right, if Vernon cuts us off it's your fault, asshole!

Brian: (To Claire) What'd he say? Where're we going?

Claire shrugs her shoulders in response. As they come up to another hallway, they see Vernon walking with his back turned and started running. But everywhere they went, Vernon would be in their sights. Then they all stop.

Bender: Wait! Wait, hold it! Hold it! We have to go through the cafeteria!

Andrew: No, the activities hall.

Bender: Hey man, you don't know what you're talking about!

Andrew: No you don't know what you're talking about!

Allison squeaks to get their attention.

Andrew: Now we're through listening to you, we're going this way.

They all keep running again, until they reach Andrew's direction but the hallway is blocked by an iron gate.

Andrew: Shit!

Bender: Great idea Jagoff!

Andrew: Fuck you!

Claire: (To Andrew) Fuck you! Why didn't you listen to John?

Bernia: (To Claire) Since when the fuck you listen to him!?

Brian: We're dead!

Bender: No, just me...

Brian: What do you mean?

Bender looks at Brian.

Bender: Get back to the library, keep your unit on this!

Bender puts the bag of weed down Brian's pants, starts to run but then stop.

Bender: (To Brian) Oh yeah, Dweebie, I'm sorry that I purposely made fun of your home life.

Brian just looks at Bender, just looked at him.

Bender: Yeah, I would've never bought that either. Gotta go!

Bender starts running off now.

Bender: (Singing Loudly) I WANNA BE AN AIRBOURNE RANGER...!

Andrew: Alright, lets get back!

They all start running back. Vernon stops walking to hear Bender's voice echo through the halls.

Bender: (Loud voice echoing) I WANNA LIVE A LIFE OF DANGER...!

Vernon: That son of a bitch!

Bender is now running through a hallway, touching every single locker.

Bender: (Still singing loudly) BEFORE THE DAY I DIE, THERE ARE FIVE THINGS I WANNA RIDE! RIFLE, LIFEBOAT, AUTOMOBILE, VERNON'S MOTHER AND A FERRIS WHEEL...!

As Bender continues to run through hallways, even jumping to rip a piece of paper from the clip chart.

Bender: (Loudly once more) I WANNA BE AN AIRBORNE RANGER, I WANNA LIVE A LIFE OF DANGER...!

Vernon is still looking for Bender in the hall, until he hears a basketball bounce echoing. He finds him in the gym screaming.

Bender: Three...two...one!

Bender dunks the ball and shouts in victory and Vernon enters.

Vernon: Bender! Bender! Bender! What is this? What are you doing here, what is this?

Bender: Oh, hi!

Bender dribbles the ball.

Vernon: Out! That's it Bender! Out, it's over!

Bender: Don't you wanna hear my excuse?

Vernon: Out!

Bender: I'm thinking of trying out for a scholarship.

Vernon: Give me the ball, Bender.

Bender fake throws the ball at Vernon, rolls it on the ground to Vernon who kicks it back at Bender, who jumps out of the way only for his shoe to come off. They leave.

The rest of the kids are sitting back in their seats when Bender and Vernon enter, Vernon pushes Bender.

Vernon: Get your stuff, let's go! (To everyone) Mr. Wiseguy has taken it upon himself to go to the gymnasium. I'm sorry to inform you, you're going to be without his services for the rest of the day.

Bender: B-O-O-H-O-O!

Vernon: Everything's a big joke, huh Bender? The false alarm you pulled, on Friday, false alarms are real funny, aren't they...What if your home, what if your family...what if your dope was on fire?

Bender: Impossible, sir...it's in Johnson's underwear...

Brian's eyes widen and Andrew laughs.

Vernon: (To Andrew) You think he's funny? You think this is cute? You think he's bitchin, is that it? Let me tell you something. Look at him, he's a bum. (To everybody) You wanna see something funny? You go visit John Bender in five years! You'll see how goddamned funny he is! (To Bender) What's the matter, John? You gonna cry? Let's go...

Vernon grabs Bender's shoulder.

Bender: Hey keep your fucking hands off me! I expect better manners from you, Dick!

Bender takes out his sunglasses from his pocket and puts on the table in front of Andrew.

Bender: (To Andrew) For better hallway vision!

Bender leaves, but not before giving a wink at Andrew who smirks at him, and then pushing stuff off the desk making Vernon chase him. Vernon then puts Bender in a closet now talking to him with Bender sitting holding both his knees.

Vernon: That's the last time, Bender. That's the last time you ever make me look bad in front of those kids, do you hear me? I make $31,000 dollars a year and I have a home and I'm not about to throw it away on some punk like you...But someday, man, someday. When you're outta here and you've forgotten all about this place...And they've forgotten all about you and you're wrapped up in your own pathetic life...I'm gonna be there. That's right. And I'm gonna kick the living shit out of you, man, I'm gonna knock your dick in the dirt!

Bender: You threatening me?

Vernon: What 're you gonna do about it? You think anybody's gonna believe you? You think anybody's gonna take your word over mine? I'm a man of respect around here. People love me here, I'm a swell guy...you're a lying sack of shit! And everybody knows it!

Bender scoffs at Vernon not believing him. Vernon then takes off his suit and throws it to the ground.

Vernon: Oh, you're a real tough guy...come on, come on...get on your feet, pal! Let's find out how tough you are! I wanna know right now, how tough you are! Come on! I'll give you the first punch, let's go! Come on, right here, just take the first shot! Please, I'm begging you, take a shot! Come on, just one shot, that's all I need, just one swing...

Bender just sits there staring at Vernon, looking half scared. Vernon fakes a punch making Bender flinch.

Vernon: That's what I thought...you're a gutless turd!

Vernon then picks up his suit, leaves the closet leaving Bender like a caged animal. He then locks the door after him. Bender however already at work, piles a bunch of stuff in the corner and then climbs up a hatch in the ceiling and disappears, slowly crawling through the heating duct. As he starts crawling, Bender tells a joke to no one in particular but himself.

Bender: (To himself) A naked blond walks into a bar, with a poodle under one arm and a two foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bar-tender says: "I suppose you won't be needing a drink." The naked lady says...

Before he could finish, the ceiling under Bender gives in and he falls through.

Bender: (Screaming) OH SHIT!!!

The rest of the gang hears and see's what that was.

Vernon: (Outside the library in the bathroom) Jesus Christ, almighty!

Bender then walks down the stairs and the kids stare at him.

Bender: ...Forgot my pencil.

Bender sees Brian and Bernia were sitting at his table.

Bender walks over to where Brian originally took a seat during the beginning of the day and picks up a pencil. they hear Vernon in the hall and Bender hides underneath the table where Claire and Andrew are sitting. Vernon then enters.

Vernon: God dammit! What in God's name is going on in here? What was that ruckus?

Andrew: Uh, what ruckus?

Vernon: I was just in my office and I heard a ruckus!

Brian: Could you describe this ruckus, sir?

Vernon: (Pointing to Brian) Watch your tongue young man, watch it!

Bender sits up under the table, only for him to hit his head. He groans in pain.

Above the table, Andrew and Claire try to take credit for making the noise. Bender bangs underneath the table twice, Allison takes her feet off the table with her biting her nails again and Brian and Bernia sitting next to each other hit their knees against the bottom part of the table with Brian rubbing his knee in pain.

Bernia: You okay?

Brian: Yeah.

Andrew makes a zipping noise.

Vernon: What is that? What, what is that, what is that noise?

Underneath the table, Bender looks between Claire's legs and sees her panties.

Andrew: (To Vernon) What noise?

Bender puts his head between Claire's legs.

Claire: Really, sir, there wasn't any noise...

Claire squeals between her sentence and squeezes Bender's head between her knees. Bender lets out a yelp of pain. Claire does an exaggerated sneeze and then starts fake coughing along with everyone else. She even tries stomping on Bender's hands and fingers to make him stop.

Claire: (Flustered) That noise? Was that the noise you were talking about?

Vernon: No it wasn't. That was not the noise I was talking about. Now, I may have not caught you in the act, yet, but you can bet I will.

Allison laughs at Vernon.

Vernon: (To Allison) You can book on that missy! (To Claire) And you! I will not be made a fool of!

As he walks away to leave, they all see that Vernon still has the toilet seat cover was stuck on the back of his pants. As the door closes, They all laugh except for Claire. Bender comes from under the table only to receive a barrage of slaps on the back from Claire.

Bender: It was an accident!

Claire: You're an asshole!

Bender: Sue me...

Bender gets up and walks up to Brian and Bernia again.

Bender: (To Brian) So, Ahab...can I have all my doobage?

Brian unzips his pants taking out the marijuana, not noticing Bernia sneaking a glance down at his unzipped area biting her lip.

Andrew: (To Bender) Yo, waistoid...you're not blazing up in here!

Bender ignores him and keeps walking into the back area of the library. Claire looks back at Bender walking, turns back around, thinking about the urge to smoke her first cigarette. She then looks at Andrew who shakes his head at her not to do it, she gets up anyway and walks to where Bender is. Bernia then gets up.

Bernia: Come on, Brian.

Brian: Huh?

Bernia extends her hand to Brian who takes it and stands up. She then puts her arms around his neck.

Bernia: Let's go load up. Trust me, it feels good afterwards.

Brian stares intensely at her then turns to Andrew who glares at him and back to Bernia.

Bernia: (To Brian) Please? For me?

She then proceeds to put Brian's hand on her breast making him really nervous. He turns to Andrew.

Brian: (Mouthing to Andrew) Maybe, just a little...

Andrew: (Mouthing back to Brian) I'm not doing that!

Brian turns back to her. Bernia then takes Brian's finger and puts in her mouth to get the tip of it wet, moves it into her panties forcing it there and flexes Brian's forearm, making her slip out a single moan. Brian felt like he was going to die of ecstasy. Finally he nodded to her in defeat and she smiled. She then got in his face nose to nose and zips up his pants.

Bernia: Come on...

Bernia starts walking with the collar of Brian's green sweater in her hand. Andrew could not believe that even Brian left to go smoke all because of a girl. But then again, he understood why. Allison looks at Andrew as he decides whether or not he wanted to go or not.

Andrew: Shit...

Andrew gets up, taking Bender's sunglasses with him leaving Allison all by herself with her mouth open.


	8. TBCR: Chapter Eight.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smoking weed insues, secrets unveil and feelings get expressed.

Bender, Brian, Claire and Bernia were all sitting in a circle on chairs. Brian had on Bender's sunglasses making funny faces trying to be cool. He then bursts out laughing along with the other three, making stomping noises with his feet by moving them fast. Bender lights a match from his teeth, then lights Claire up so she can take a puff. She coughs out the smoke and Brian and Bender laugh at her. Claire smiles and then tries again, Bernia blows out smoke and twists her head around as if she was lost and giggles. She, Claire and Bender look at Brian who blows smoke and then tries to eat it. The two girls laugh loving Brian's high side, he then starts talking in a weird tone.

Brian: (High) Chicks, can not hold der smoke! That's what it is!

They all laugh. Bernia looks at Brian like he was crazy.

Bernia: Oh, really?

Bernia takes a real long puff, passes it to Bender and then sits on Brian's lap. His shyness gone from sight, he grabs her waist with one arm. Bernia then asks for Brian to open his mouth and she blows the smoke into it. They both laugh.

Bernia: (To Brian) Does that answer your question about chicks holding their smoke?

Brian: (High) Ditto babe.

Claire: Do you know popular I am? I am so popular, everybody loves me so much, at this school...

Bender: Poor baby.

Brian motions for Bender to give him a hi-five. He does, but he ends up giving him one so hard they it sent Brian on the ground. Claire and Bernia burst out laughing. Andrew comes out of the foreign language room that's filled with smoke. He inhales another puff and then starts dancing. Runs to do a cartwheel, takes off his jacket and throws it, dives and dances like a madman. Swipes the American flag, stands on top of a view chair and then takes his white thermal shirt off and throws that. Everyone looks and cheers for Andrew, Brian whistles at him. Andrew dances back into the room, slams the door and lets out a scream loud enough that it shatters the glass from the door. Allison watches all this, as if she's not part of them. After watching them get high, she goes into a room, climbs on top of a table, gets on her knees. She then not only hugs herself, but even hums to herself.

Meanwhile with Vernon, he is looking through the confidential files in the school basement.

Vernon: (To himself) Mister, oh mister Tearney...a history of slight mental illness? Wooh, no wonder he's so fucked up!

All of a sudden, Carl enters.

Carl: Afternoon, Dick...

Vernon: Hey Carl, how you doing?

Carl: Good...

Vernon: Good. What's up?

Carl: Not much. What's happening, what are you doing here in the basement files?

Vernon: Oh, nothing, nothing here. I'm just doing a little homework here...

Carl: Homework, huh?

Vernon: Yeah...

Carl, not believing Vernon, laughs and comes over to see what files that he's looking at.

Carl: Confidential files...hmm?

Vernon: Look, Carl... this is a highly sensitive area and I, I tell you something...certain people would be very, very embarrassed. I would really appreciate it if, if, if, if this is something that,you and I could keep between us...

Carl: What're you gonna do for me man?

Vernon: Well, what would you like?

Carl: Got fifty bucks?

Vernon: What?

Carl: Fifty bucks...

Back in the library, Andrew, Brian and Bernia are laughing, Allison is hanging out over by the statue in the back of the library and Bender and Claire are sitting down.

Andrew: (To Brian) No, no man, no; you got a middle name?

Brian: Yeah, guess...

Allison takes interest in the conversation. As she speaks, she moves to sit next to the trio.

Allison: (To Brian) Your middle name is Ralph, as in puke...

Andrew, Brian and Bernia look at her in confusion.

Allison: ...Your birthday is March 12th, you're five-nine and a half, you weigh a hundred and thirty pounds and your social security number is 0-4-9-3-8-0-9-1-3.

Andrew and Bernia are impressed.

Andrew: Are you physic?

Allison: No...

Brian: Well you mind telling me how you, you know all this about me?

Allison reaches in her bag.

Allison: I stole your wallet...

She shows it and grins.

Brian: Give it to me...

Allison: No...

Brian: Please, give it.

Allison: Because you said please.

Allison gives it to him due to his politeness.

Brian: (Curious) Are you, like a theif?

Allison: I'm not a theif!

Brian: Sorry...I meant, uh, multi-talented.

Allison feels a little better, giving Brian a small smile.

Brian: You didn't uh...

Allison: Come on Bri, what's there to steal? Just two bucks and a beaver shot!

The trio's eyes widen.

Andrew and Bernia in union: A what?

Brian: (Mouthing to Allison) No! No! Stop!

Allison: He's got a nudie picture in there! I saw it, it's perverted!

Andrew: Alright, let's see!

Bender is brushing his teeth with one of Claire's cosmetic brushes.

Claire: (To Bender) Are these all your girlfriends?

Bender: Some of them...

Claire: What about the others?

Bender: Well, some I consider my girlfriends and some...I just consider...

Claire: Consider what?

Bender: Whether or not, I wanna hang out with them...

Claire: You don't believe in just one guy, one girl?

Bender: Do you?

Claire: Yeah...that's the way it should be.

Bender: Well, not for me...

Claire: Why not?

Bender didn't answer right away so he acts defensive.

Bender: How come you got so much shit in your purse?

Claire: How come you got so many girlfriends?

Bender: I asked you first...

Claire: I don't know...I guess I never throw anything away.

Bender: Neither do I...

Claire: Oh...

Andrew and Bernia are now looking through Brian's wallet with Allison looking on.

Andrew: This is the worst fake ID I've ever seen...

Brian and Bernia laugh.

Andrew: (To Brian) Do you realize you made yourself look sixty eight?

Brian: Oh, I know...I know, I goofed it.

Bernia: I'll bet you still look good at that age.

Brian smiles at her.

Andrew: What do you need a fake ID for Brian?

Brian: (Like it's obvious) So I can vote!

Allison looks up suddenly.

Allison: You wanna see what's in my bag?

Bernia: Sure, why not?

Brian: Yeah...

Andrew: Okay...

Allison looks at Bernia and gives her a full smile. Bernia returns it. Allison then dumps the contents of her bag onto the couch.

Andrew: Holy shit! What is all that stuff?

Brian: You always carry that much shit in your bag?

Allison: Yeah...I always carry this much shit...in my bag...you never know when you might have to jam...

Bernia: You know, Allison, I don't know you that well. But, I would like too. Why do you feel the need to, you know...find random things?

Allison: I'll do what I have to do...

Brian: Why do you have to do anything?

Allison: (With feeling) My home life is un...satisfying...

Brian: (Worried) So you're saying you'd subject yourself to the violent dangers of the Chicago streets because your home life is unsatisfying?

Allison: I don't have to run away and live in the street...I can run away and, go to the ocean, I can go to the country, I can go to the mountains. I can go to Israel, Africa, Afghanistan...

Brian looks at her and nods.

Brian: I guess you and I are in the same boat then. I don't blame you there.

Allison smiles. Brian looks to Bernia.

Brian: What about you, Bernia?

Bernia: I would travel to see my mother's home in Ireland, then see France and Canada which my father is. Traveling around the world is fun.

Brian: Andrew, you wanna get in this?

Andrew: What?

Brian: Allison says she wants to run away because her home life is unsatisfying, and I don't blame her one bit because it can get a little boring. Even at my own house.

Andrew: Well, everyone's home lives are unsatisfying...If it wasn't, people would live with their parents forever...

Bernia: He's right.

Brian: Oh, I know. I just wanna say that Allison, don't worry. You're not alone.

Allison gave all of them a smile.

Brian: Allison?

Allison: Yeah?

Brian: (Hesitated) Well, um, I was afraid to ask this. I mean it's kinda pointless bringing it up again from the middle of the day but um...you get along with your parents?

Allison looks at Brian for a moment but then looks down, she then puts the stuff she dumped out back in her bag.

Brian: Allison, No. I didn't mean to-

Allison: It's okay...I'm just gonna...

She gets up and walks away. Brian felt guilty.

Brian: I didn't mean to upset her. Great, she probably hates now.

Bernia: Shhh. She doesn't hate you. She's getting used to opening up.

Brian: And I'm getting used in not shutting up...

Andrew: Hey don't worry bout it. I'll go talk to her.

Andrew goes after Allison, leaving Brian and Bernia alone wit each other.

Brian: I'm a real dweeb am I?

Bernia shushes him again, stroking his cheek.

Bernia: Can I show you something?

Brian: Sure...

Bernia digs in her pants pocket and pulls out a picture of herself. Although she was much different. Bernia in the picture had curly hair, braces, wore geeky girl clothes and was a little pale.

Brian: Was that...you?

Bernia: Yep. I was way more much of a dweeb back then. Until, one day I got tired of the teasing and so on. Infact, one of Claire's friends 2nd in command, Yolanda Archibald was the main one that always tried to fuck with me. So, I changed myself. You ever felt like you loved yourself no matter what, but you don't like what you see?

Brian: Everyday. Story of my life...

Bernia looked at Brian sadly but then reached in her back pocket to pull out a ring and puts it on her finger.

Bernia: You see this?

Brian takes a look at the ring.

Bernia: My mother gave this to me to remind me that I'm always loved and to be strong no matter what. They helped me infact with my look as you see me now. This ring has brought me more luck and courage then I thought. Her mother gave it to her when she was a child, but even before then her Grandmother had it way before she did. I guess, it brought all of them luck.

Brian: How lucky was this ring?

Bernia: Well, it did make my mom meet my father. They were so in love. Now, it's liked they've lost that passion that they once had, you know? So mom gave it to me as a way for me to find the same passion of feelings they had. I want to see them rekindle that so bad but, what can I do?

Brian: ...Never stop believing...I haven't...especially since I've met you.

Bernia smiles at Brian and she then hugs him really tight, not letting go and letting the tears flow.

Bernia: (Crying softly) Thank you...so much, Brian.

He said nothing. They just let the moment sink in. Andrew was over to Allison.

Andrew: (To Allison) Hi, you wanna talk?

Allison: I don't know...

Andrew: Come on. Please?

Allison looks at him, silently crying.

Allison: We have problems...

Andrew: Oh, we do?

Allison: I'm to weird for people to understand and, no offense, but you do everything what everyone else tells you.

Andrew: No I don't!

Allison didn't say anything.

Andrew: Look, come on! At least tell me what's wrong? If this is about what Brian asked you, he didn't mean to hurt you.

Allison: I know. It's just that...

Andrew: What? Is it bad?

Allison stays quiet.

Andrew: Real bad?

Still no answer.

Andrew: Parents?

Allison: Yeah...

Andrew nods, knowing Brian was right.

Andrew: What they do to you?

Allison: They ignore me...

Andrew: Yeah...yeah...

They are now both silently crying.


	9. TBCR: Chapter Nine.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vernon and Carl talk more about kids today. The others are in a circle talking and revealing even more stuff and things about one another on emotional levels.

Back in the basement, Vernon and Carl are sitting and talking.

Vernon: (To Carl) What did you want to be when you were young?

Carl: When I was a kid, I wanted to be John Lennon...

Vernon: Carl don't be a goof! I'm trying to make a serious point here...I've been teaching, for twenty two years, and each year...these kids get more arrogant.

Carl: Aw bullshit, man. Come on, Vern, the kids haven't changed, you have! You took a teaching position, cause you'd thought it'd be fun, right? Thought you could have summer vacations off...and then you found out it was actually work...and that really bummed you out.

Vernon: These kids turned on me...they think I'm a big fucking joke...

Carl: Come on...listen Vern, if you were sixteen, what would you think of you, huh?

Vernon: Hey...Carl, do you think I give one rat's ass what these kids think of me?

Carl: Yeah I do...

Vernon: You think about this...when you get old, these kids; when I get old, they're gonna be runnin' the country.

Carl: Yeah?

Vernon: Now this is the thought that wakes me up in the middle of the night...that when I get older, these kids are gonna take care of me...

Carl: I wouldn't count on it...

Vernon ponders that statement from Carl for a moment. Back in the library, everyone was sitting on the floor in a circle.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Andrew: What would I do for a million bucks? Well, I guess I'd do as little as I have to...

Claire: That's boring...

Andrew: Well, how I'm supposed to answer?

Claire: The idea is to search your mind for the absolute limit. Like, uh, would you drive to school naked?

Andrew laughs.

Andrew: Um, uh...would I have to get out of the car?

Claire: Of course...

Andrew: In the spring, or winter?

Claire: It doesn't matter...spring...

Andrew: In front of the school or in back of the school?

Claire: Either one...

Andrew: Yes...

Bernia: (To everyone) Well, I haven't told anybody this before, so uh, I'm bisexual.

Everyone looks at her.

Bender: Really now, Vixen? So, you like chicks too?

Bernia: Yeah...there was one time that I had a made out with a black girl. We were both fifteen at the time.

Brian: Really? How was it?

Bernia: (Smiles and winks at Brian) So nice...very, very sensual...

Brian blushed at the thought of two girls having physical content.

Andrew: That's hot!

Bender: Hell yeah it is!

Claire shakes her head smiling.

Allison: I'd do that!

Everyone looks at her.

Allison: (To Claire) I'll do anything sexual, boy or girl, I don't need a million dollars to do it either...

Claire: You're lying...

Allison: I already have...I've done just about everything there is except a few things that are illegal...

Bernia: Yeah?

Allison nods.

Allison: I'm a nymphomaniac!

Claire rolls her eyes.

Claire: Lie...

Bernia: (To Claire) Shut up!

Brian: (To Allison) Are your parents aware of this? I'm not judging, but, they should be worried about you.

Allison shakes her head.

Allison: Only person I ever told was my shrink...

Andrew: What'd he do when you told him?

Allison shrugs her shoulders.

Allison: Ne nailed me...

Awkward silence.

Claire: Very nice...

Bernia: Allison, wouldn't that be...you know...

Allison: I don't think from a legal standpoint what he did could be construed as rape since I paid him.

Claire: He's an adult!

Allison: Yeah...he's married too.

Claire notes her disgust.

Claire: Do you know how gross that is?

Allison: Well, the first few times...

Claire: First few times!? You mean you've done it more than once?

Allison: Sure...

Claire: Are you crazy?

Brian: Obviously she's crazy if she's screwing her shrink...

Bernia: (To Claire) Why does she have to be crazy? Maybe she was curious. (To Allison) Right Allison, you were only curious and curiosity caught you right?

Allison again smiles at Bernia and then turns her attention back to Claire.

Allison: (To Claire) Have you ever done it?

Claire: I don't even have a psychiatrist...

Allison: Have you ever done it with a normal person?

Claire: Didn't we already cover this?

Bender: (Breaking his silence) You never answered the question...

Claire: Look, I'm not going to discuss my private life with total strangers.

Bernia: Why? You didn't seem to have a problem asking Brian was he a pig, and he wasn't.

Claire: That was different...

Allison: It's kind of a double-edge sword, isn't it?

Claire: A what?

Allison: Well, if you say you haven't...you're a prude. If you say you have...you're a slut! It's a trap. You want to but you can't but when you do you wish you didn't, right?

Claire: (Half smiling) Wrong...

Allison: Or, are you a tease?

Claire's half smile falls quickly.

Andrew: She's a tease...

Bernia: Dead giveaway...

Claire: Oh why don't you guys just forget it?

Andrew: You're a tease and you know it, all girls are teases!

Bernia: Well, I know I am anyway...but for obviously one person.

Bernia looks at Brian again who hides his smile.

Brian: (To Bernia giggling) No doubt you're a tease!

Bernia giggles back.

Bender: Well, Claire's only a tease if what she does gets you hot...

Claire: I don't do anything!

Allison: That's why, you're a tease...

Claire: Okay, let me ask you a few questions.

Allison: (Grinning) I already told you everything!

Claire: No! Doesn't it bother to sleep around without being in love? I mean don't you want any respect?

Bernia: What the hell does she have to get respect for!?

Allison: I don't screw to get respect...That's the difference between you and me...

Claire: Not the only difference, I hope.

Bender: Face it, you're a tease.

Claire: I'm not a tease!

Bender: Sure you are! You said it yourself sex is a weapon, you use it to get respect!

Claire: No, I never said that, she twisted my words around!

Bender: Oh, then what do you use it for?

Claire: I don't use it period!

Bender: Oh, are you medically frigid or is it psychological?

Claire: I didn't mean it that way! You guys are putting words into my mouth!

Bender: Well, if you just answer the question...

Brian: Why don't you answer the question?

Andrew: Be honest...

Bender: No big deal!

Bernia: Yeah, answer it!

Andrew: Answer the question, Claire!

Bender: Talk to us!

Andrew & Brian: Come on, answer the question!

Bender: It's easy, it's only one question!

Bernia: (Playfully screaming) ANSWER THE QUESTION!

Claire: NO! I NEVER DID IT!

Another awkward silence.

Bernia: Truth sets you free...

Claire: Whatever...

Allison: I never did it either, I'm not a nymphomaniac...I'm a compulsive liar...

Claire: You are such a bitch! You did that on purpose just to fuck me over!

Allison: But I would do it though...if you love someone then it's okay.

Claire: I can't believe you, you're so weird. You don't say anything all day and when you open your mouth...you unload all these tremendous lies all over me!

Bernia: Well, now you know what it's like right?

Claire: What are you talking about, Bernia?

Bernia: Yolanda Archibald? Your "friend" that made my life hell as well? I showed Brian a picture of how I used to look, I was just as much of a geek as any of Brian's friends. One day, she and her other friends who were also you're "friends", they kept fucking with me that they even nearly stripped me half naked in front of the entire school! Everyone saw my night clothes that I used to sleep with, they were as if they had been found in a slaughterhouse! Your fucking interchangeable, plastic, mannequin friends almost made me thought about ending it all! But because of my family, they kept me believing that I had a worth to live and not take the easy way out. That's why I hated you Claire Standish...And I probably will for the rest of my life!

It got silent for awhile and everyone let Bernia blow some steam. Brian moved beside her and wiped the tears from her eyes.

Claire: Well it's not my fault their like that! I mean what do you guys want from me?

Andrew: (To Claire) You're just still pissed at Allison because she got you to admit something you didn't wanna do!

Claire: Okay, fine, but that doesn't make it any less bizarre...

Andrew: What's bizarre? I mean we're all pretty bizarre! Some of us are just better at hiding it, that's all.

Claire gives him a look of non-believing.

Claire: (To Andrew) How are you bizarre?

He takes a while but Allison decides to field that question.

Allison: He can't think for himself...

Andrew: She's right...do you guys know what, uh, what I did to get in here?

Everyone shakes their heads.

Andrew: I tapped Larry Lester's buns together.

Claire laughs.

Brian: (To Andrew) That was you?

Andrew: (To Brian) Yeah, you know him?

Brian: Yeah, I know him.

Bernia looks at Brian and then back to Andrew.

Andrew: Well, then you know how hairy he is, right?

Bender gives a wide grin at this.

Andrew: Well, when they pulled the tape off, most of his hair came off and some, some skin too...

Claire: Oh my God...

Andrew: And the bizarre thing is, is that I did it for my old man...I tortured this poor kid, because I wanted him to think I was cool. He's always going off about, you know, when he was in school...all the wild things he used to do. And I got the feeling that he was disappointed that I never cut loose on anyone, right...So, I'm...I'm sitting in the locker room, and I'm taping up my knee. And Larry's undressing a couple of lockers down from me. Yeah...he's kinda...he's kinda skinny, weak. And I started thinking about my father, and his attitude about weakness. And the next thing I knew, I uh, I jumped on top of him and started wailing on him...And my friends, they just laughed and cheered me on. And afterwards, when I was sittin' in Vernon's office, all I could think about was Larry's father. And Larry havin' to go home and...and explain what happen to him. And the humiliation...fucking humiliation he must've felt. It must've been unreal...I mean, (Starts to cry) I mean, how do you apologize for something like that? There's no way...it's all because of me and my old man. Oh God, I fucking hate him! He's like this...he's like this mindless machine that I can't even relate to anymore...

Allison looks at Andrew very silent, Bender has his head down in shame and Brian is holding his hand on his face because Larry is one of his close friends. Claire and Bernia felt tears well up in their eyes.

Andrew: (Imitating his father) "Andrew, you've got to be number one! I won't tolerate any losers in this family...Your intensity is for shit! Win. Win! WIN!!!" (Back to himself) You son of a bitch! You know, sometimes, I wish my knee would give...and I wouldn't be able to wrestle anymore. He could for get all about me...

Bender: I think your old man and my old man should get together and go bowling.

Andrew laughs briefly at that. Brian takes his hand of his face and looks at Andrew.


	10. TBCR: Chapter Ten.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brian like Andrew gets deep on his parents. They talk about what they can do and of course Bender has to ruin a good thing but hey, that's Bender. But as things get personal, they eventually breakdown in their own ways and learn to accept how they are and appreciate why.

Brian: Andrew?

 

Andrew: Yeah?

 

Brian: It's like me, you know, I think I can relate to your story a little bit. Although, it, it involves my mom and uh, like, with my grades. But it, it goes deeper than that, you know?

 

Andrew: How so?

 

Everyone now looks at Brian.

 

Brian: Well, when I'm like this all the time, myself, I feel...I feel there's always limitations and obstacles...trying to hold me down, and you know, my mother always made me felt that way ever since I started school. There would be lecture after lecture from her all the time. And I feel like I'm...just society's pawn. But when, when we were getting high earlier, when I was smoking and when I had Bender's sunglasses on, I literally felt free. Free of any setbacks or burdens that I have to put up with because of her. Anything she said just finally vanished from my mind, I felt I was one of the cool ones, you know? That's why I always felt that...if I could just step outside myself kinda, always felt I wish I can do that because I felt I lacked a fun lifestyle. So, I wished every time I could because, every time I look in the mirror at home, and, I see me but I don't...I don't like what I see...I really don't.

 

Bernia felt her heart was broken as Brian too felt he needed to change.

 

Claire: (To Brian) What's wrong with you? Why don't you like yourself?

 

Brian: It's stupid. And, forgive me guys if this sounds pathetic...

 

Bernia: (Softly) No, please! Brian...I wanna hear. I'll never judge.

 

Brian looks at her with a small smile.

 

Brian: Well see, obviously I'm the nerd, right? So people would label me as the one who's got the good grades and a good future and a happy life...shit like that. Well, my life is not all happy as people would assume...my mom would always make me study like 24/7 because she said she didn't want me to be a no life idiot. She always went on and on about she graduated on the top of her classes and everyone around her were low-lives, Now which brings me to why she's always on my back. See, I'm failed shop or still am failing. See we had this assignment to make uh, (Mumbles) Oh God, this feels so uncomfortable telling you this. To make uh, an ceramic elephant and we had eight weeks to do it. So uh, we had to make it into a lamp or something where you pull the trunk and the light is supposed to come on, which it didn't and I failed. So, I got an F. I never got an F in my life but, I always thought no big deal right? But uh, when I got home and told her, she immediately flipped out on me, started cursing as she was some sort of sailor or something. My Dad, would try and stop her but she'll keep going arguing with him in front of me and my little sister, Emily.

 

Bernia: (To Brian worried) I get it. She's one of those people who believe just because you're smart that everyone should worship and thinks everything's perfect when in reality, she doesn't realize she's hurting you with all that responsibility...

 

Brian: Yeah...you know, when I signed up, for the course I mean, I thought I would play it real smart. Cause I'd thought, that if I take shop, that would mean it would be easier to maintain my grade point average.

 

Bender: Why'd you think it would be easy?

 

Brian: At the time I didn't know. Really that was my mom's idea too. Infact, there was almost a time where I started to regretfully agree with her because I'm thinking at the rest of the students in the class: Have you seen some of the dopes that take shop? But, right there...right there, when I thought of that, I believe it was the start of my downfall. The F, the pressure from her...it's because of me. That minute, I became what she wanted me to be. I became what I hated. I became a person with a superior complex over everyone. And I hated that so fucking much! And I don't want to feel that way again because I know I'm not better then anyone or everyone, even the people who pick on me or my friends. I'm not better then you guys or anyone, you know, I just do the work. But for that one second, I thought I was better than everyone and it brought me in here. I really pray to God, that I don't feel that way again. I don't want people hating me for something I didn't wanna feel to begin with, you know?

 

Andrew: Damn, Brian.

 

Bender: In other words, Brian...you don't want to be another dick like Vernon?

 

Brian: Yeah.

 

Bender: I don't blame you there. You know, I take shop...if you need help with that elephant project I can. Also, no offense...but you must be a fucking idiot. I mean you're a genius who can't make a lamp.

 

Brian: Well, I told you it was pathetic.

 

Bernia: (To Bender) But at least he was honest about not wanting to feel above everybody. No one wants that. Come on, Bender you barley can keep up on Trigonometry!

 

Bender looks at her.

 

Brian: You know Trigonometry, Bender?

 

Bender: I could care less about Trigonometry...

 

Brian: I, I was just gonna say...without Trigonometry, there'd be no engineering, that's all.

 

Bender: Well, Brian...without lamps there'd be no lights!

 

Claire: (To Brian and Bender) Okay so neither one of you is any better than the other one. I mean, Bender...Brian did say he's not better than you so I think he means we're all good at certain things but not better.

 

Bender: Yeah. Brian, my bad dude.

 

Brian: It's okay.

 

Allison feels left out and breaks her silence.

 

Allison: I can write with my toes! I can also eat, and brush my teeth...

 

Claire: With your feet?

 

Allison: ...play Heart & Soul on the piano.

 

Brian: I can make spaghetti!

 

Bernia giggles at Brian.

 

Bernia: (To Brian) You can cook?

 

Brian: A little...

 

Bernia Well, I do aerobics, gymnastics, I can repair motorbikes and such. But also I can act, a little anyway.

 

Claire: (To Andrew) What can you do?

 

Andrew: I can...uh...tape all your buns together...

 

Bender: I wanna see what Claire can do!

 

Claire: I can't do anything.

 

Bender: Now, everybody can do something...

 

Claire: There is one thing I can do, no forget it, it's to embarrassing.

 

Bender: Have you ever seen Wild Kingdom? I mean that guy's been doing that show for thirty years.

Claire: (To Bender) Okay, but you have to swear to God you won't laugh...

 

Bender motions a cross to himself.

 

Claire: ...I can't believe I'm actually doing this...

 

Everyone watches Claire take out her lipstick and open it. She places it between her breasts and applies it from her cleavage. When she lifts her head, her lipstick is perfect. Then everyone claps.

 

Andrew: All right, great! Where'd you learn to that?

 

Claire: Summer camp, seventh grade...

 

Bernia: I regret not going to camp.

 

As everyone's clapping, Bender's clap is sarcastic and slow.

 

Bender: That was great, Claire...my image of you is totally blown...

 

Allison: (To Bender) You're a shit! Don't do that to her you swore to God you wouldn't laugh!

 

Bender: Am I laughing?

 

Claire looks upset.

 

Bernia: (To Bender) You're a real idiot!

 

Andrew: (To Bender) You fucking prick!

 

Bender: (To Andrew) What do you care what I think, anyway? I don't even count, right? I could disappear forever and it wouldn't make any difference...I may as well not even exist at this school, remember? (To Claire) And you...you don't like me anyway!

 

Claire: You know, I have just as many feelings as you and it hurts just as much when somebody steps all over them!

 

Bender: (To Claire) God, you're so pathetic! (Furious) Don't you ever...ever! Compare yourself to me! Okay? You got everything, and I got shit! Fuckin' Rapunzel, right? School would probably fucking shut down if you didn't show up! Queenie isn't here! I like those earrings Claire.

 

Claire: (Quietly) Shut up...

 

Bender: Are those real diamonds, Claire?

 

Claire: (Angry) Shut up.

 

Bender: I bet they are...did you work, for the money for those earrings?

 

Claire: Shut...your mouth!

 

Bender: Or did your daddy buy those?

 

Claire: (Furious) SHUT UP!

 

Bender: I bet he bought those for you! I bet those were Christmas gifts! Right?! You wanna know what I got for Christmas this year? It was a banner fuckin' year at the old Bender family! I got a carton of cigarettes! The old man grabbed me and said "Hey! Smoke up Johnny!" Okay? So go home and cry to your daddy, don't cry here, okay?

 

Everyone stays silent for awhile, until Andrew speaks.

 

Andrew: My God, are we really gonna be like our parents?

 

Claire: Not me...ever...

 

Allison: It's unavoidable, it just happens.

 

Claire: What happens?

 

Allison: When you grow up, your heart dies.

 

Bender: Who cares?

 

Allison: I care...

 

Bernia: I care too. You lose the passion you once had for something or someone. You start to give up on life, and the hopes and dreams that you once mourned for because of your roadblocks. But sometimes...Sometimes you have to die a little inside in order to be reborn, and rise again as a stronger and wiser you.

 

Brian: Well um, I was just thinking. I mean, I know it's kind of a weird time, but I was just wondering, um, what is gonna happen to us on Monday? When we're all together again? I mean I consider you guys my friends, I'm not wrong, am I?

 

Andrew: No...

 

Brian: So, so on Monday...what happens?

 

Claire: Are we still friends, you mean? If we're friends now, that is?

 

Brian: Yeah...

 

Claire: You want the truth?

 

Brian: Yeah, I want the truth...

 

Claire: I don't think so...

 

Allison: Well, do you mean all of us or just John?

 

Claire: With all of you...

 

Andrew: That's a real nice attitude, Claire...

 

Claire: Oh, be honest, Andy...if Brian came walking up the hall to you in the hall on Monday, what would you do? I mean picture this, you're there with all the sports. I know exactly what you'd do, you'd say hi to him and when he left you'd cut him all up so your friends wouldn't think you really liked him!

 

Andrew: No way!

 

Allison: "Kay", what if I came up to you?

 

Claire: Same exact thing...

 

Bender: (Furious and yelling at Claire) YOU ARE A BITCH!

 

Claire: Why? 'Cause I'm telling the truth? That makes me a bitch?

 

Bender: No! Because you know how shitty that is to do to someone! And you don't have the balls to stand up to your friends and tell them that you're gonna like who you gonna like!

 

Claire: Okay, what about you, you hypocrite!? Why don't you take Allison to one of your heavy metal vomit parties? Or take Brian out to the parking lot at lunch to get high? Or take Bernia to skip classes everyday to get in trouble with Vernon? What about Andy for that matter, what about me? What would your friends say if we walked down the hall together? They'd laugh their asses off and you'd probably tell them you were doing it with me so they'd forgive you for being seen with me!

 

Bender: Don't you ever talk about my friends! You don't know any of my friends, you wouldn't look at any of my friends and you certainly wouldn't condescend to speak to any of my friends so you should just stick to the things you know, shopping, nail polish, your father's BMW and your poor—rich—drunk mother at the Carribbean!

 

Claire: (Kicked Bender's leg furious and crying) SHUT UP!

 

Bender: And as far as being concerned about what's gonna happen when you and I walk down the hallways at school, you can forget about it! Because it's never gonna happen! Just bury your head in the sand...and wait for your fucking prom!

 

Claire: I hate you!

 

Bender: Oh yeah? Good!

 

Silence again until Brian speaks.

 

Brian: Then I assume Bernia, Allison and I are better people than you guys, huh? Us weirdos...

(To Bernia) Do you, would you do that to me?

 

Bernia: (To Brian) Never...I could never do that to hurt you...I love you too damn much.

 

Brian's mouth hangs open as everyone listens.

 

Bernia: Yes, Brian...I love you. And I'm not ashamed to admit it because...I've felt that way about you for quite a long time now, even before detention and the change I made. I love you! I really do, truly love you...

 

Bernia then holds Brian's hand.

 

Brian: Allison?

 

Allison: I don't have any friends...

 

Brian: Well, well if you did?

 

Allison: No...I don't think the kind of friends I'd have would mind...

 

Brian: I just wanna tell, each of you, that I wouldn't do that...I wouldn't and I will not! Because I think that's real shitty!

 

Claire: (To Brian) Your friends wouldn't mind because they look up to us...

 

Bernia glares at Claire. Brian laughs at Claire.

 

Bernia: Bullshit! That is bullshit and you fucking know it! I will never...EVER look up to people like you! I still care about my other friends and would never betray them! The last thing, that I would ever wanna become is someone like you, because I rather burn myself first before I ever do that! Crocodile feelings Claire...CROCODILE FUCKING FEELINGS!

 

 

Brian: (To Claire) You're so conceited, Claire! You're so conceited. You're so, you're so full of yourself. Why are you like that?

 

Claire: (Crying) I'm not saying that to be conceited! I hate it! I hate having to go along with everything my friends say!

 

Brian: Well then when why you do it?

 

Bernia: Yeah! Why do you feel the need that you "should" go on with everything they say and do!? WHY!? ANSWER ME!!!

 

Claire: (To Brian and Bernia) I don't know, I don't...you don't understand...you don't. You're not friends with the same kind of people that Andy and I are friends with! You two can't possibly get it! You know, you just don't understand the kind of pressure that they put on you!

 

Bernia shakes her head and starts to cry. Brian is shocked and so is everybody else.

 

Brian: I don't understand what? Are you serious? You think, she doesn't get it? You don't think she understands? You think I don't understand pressure Claire? WELL FUCK YOU! Fuck you!

 

Brian hides his head with his arm and starts to cry, Bernia moves closer next to him.

 

Brian: (Crying) Do you know why I'm here today? DO YOU!? I'm here because Mr. Ryan found a gun in my locker...

 

Brian had his head down in shame, Bernia looks at Brian with wide eyes with tears falling shocked, so are Claire, Allison, Bender and Andrew.

 

Andrew: (To Brian) Why'd you have a gun in your locker?

 

Brian: Because...because...

 

He stays silent for a bit.

 

Bernia: (Crying) Brian, please! Tell me why? Why?

 

Brian: Because, everything that I told you was true! Even when Bender did the impression of my life at home...it hurted me because...that's not the kind of happy life I had! Because all the things my mother putted me through, she even, she even at times where I would be sleeping, and I hear her ranting to dad about how I'm a failure in school, life...she said I was always a waste of her time and money! She even....she'd even said that I was a waste of God's time and, she....(crying) She even wished that I was dead...so, she could save the trouble of me being the embarrassment of her and her friends...So, I tried giving her wish by putting in my locker and it would go off...and...and just end it all. The verbal abuse from her, to her own son! That's why I always wanted to be someone else for so long, That, that I'm scared that people will try to look underneath. I wished I could step outside myself, because myself, it only reminds me of how much I failed to live up to her expectations...even with my father and Emily caring for me...I still feel all alone!

 

Brian sobs more, Bernia and everyone except Bender cries.

 

Claire: (Crying) Oh, Brian...

 

Bernia holds Brian's cheeks to him look at her.

 

Bernia: (To Brian) Brian, be who you are and say how you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. Never be bullied into silence, not even by your own mom, never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of life, but define yourself. Please, Brian...don't ever do or even think that way ever again. God knows what I'd do if you weren't here with me...

 

Brian just really looks at her. He then closes his eyes and bashes a chair over. Bernia not even flinching does not let go of his face.

 

Brian: I just, considered my options, you know?

 

Claire: No! Killing yourself is not an option!

 

Bernia: (To Claire) Well, he didn't do it, did he? No, I don't think so!

 

Bender: (To Brian) When I said that I was sorry to you in the hallway, I really am now. I'm sorry...also, I think your moms would make the bowling team's captain with mine and sporto's old man.

 

Brian giggles at little at this.

 

Allison: Brian? I hate to ask this but, the gun in your locker...was it a regular hand gun?

 

Brian: No, it was a flare gun, went off in my locker.

 

Everyone then looks at him again. Andrew begins to snicker.

 

Andrew: (Snickering) Really?

 

Brian: It's not funny...

 

Andrew stops, but does it again and this time everyone starts laughing, even Brian.

 

Brian: (Laughing) Yes it is...fucking locker and elephant was destroyed!

 

Their laughing continues until Bernia speaks.

 

Bernia: (To Everyone smiling) As for me, I got in here because I'd dented Vernon's car with my motorcycle. The total damage is $35,000 dollars.

 

They all laugh again.

 

Brian: (To Bernia laughing) That must've been some real damage!

 

Aliison: You want to know what I did to get in here? Nothing...I didn't have anything better to do.

 

Bernia bursts out laughing uncontrollably and hysterically with everyone joining. Allison starts to laugh too.

 

Allison: (To Bernia and Andrew laughing) You're laughing at me!

 

Andrew and Bernia: (To Allison laughing) No!

 

Allison: (Laughing) Yeah you are!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The reason I changed up Brian's parents explanation and his reason being in detention was not just because of the flare gun, but also because I feel back then they could've gone deeper with this back in 1985 with him. Plus, I'm a big BIG supporter of his character and believe he is TRULY underutilized in fanfiction aside from Bender, Claire, Andrew and Allison. Their should be more stories with the brain of the group. Just my opinion so yeah.


	11. TBCR: Chapter Eleven/Last Chapter.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The time is almost over as they have a final hurrah in detention and express their feelings and of course...hook up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Created this story I believe in 2014 or last year and it was awesome to do. Some people may argue with their being no originality aside from my OC but that's okay. Still fun.

Later, Brian gets up, goes to the music room and puts on a record with music playing. The song was "We Are Not Alone" by Karla DeVito. Brian starts moving his head up and down with the beat of the song in sync. Allison is leaning against the statue and starts twisting her body around, she then slowly pushes herself off the statue and holds her ear with her shoulder, with her arms held away from her body. She then holds her arms out, spins around while bouncing on her toes. Brian starts flipping records around in the music section, Claire is on the balcony, kicking her feet and twists fast, Andrew is seated on the balcony railing drumming to the beat on his thigh, Bender is sitting on top of the statue headbanging and Bernia is breaking dancing and tap dancing, swaying her hips. Brian holds a small grin as he exits the music room, rolling his head to the beat. Andrew is playing air-guitar along with the music. Allison and Bender are now on the table shuffling their feet left and right, the three boys now are on the same table, marching forward with their fists in the air and then backwards, now the three girls give a shot shuffling their feet left to right and their hands held downward in the air. Bender is now moving his feet around, shaking his head back and forth like a dog, and finally Allison holds her arms in the air, shaking her whole body until she drops to floor not moving as if she was dead. Finally, when the music stops, they stop. Minutes later, they all sit on the railing. Bender smokes one last cigarette, sitting next to Andrew. Allison is between Andrew and Claire, Claire who is sitting next to Brian with his hand under his chin and fingers on his mouth, and Bernia is next to Brian, holding his other hand and her head on his shoulder. Bender breaks the silence.

Bender: So...

Andrew: So, uh...

Allison says nothing.

Claire: Yeah...

Brian and Bernia are quiet too.

Bender: (Looking at Andrew) Welp, must be on my way pukees!

Bender gets off the railing.

Bernia: Bender, where're you going?

Bender: Back to the supply closet...

Allison: What?

Bender: Yeah, Dick locked me in there when the bastard putted me outta here.

Claire: You okay?

Bender: I'll be fine.

Bender walks up to the steps but stops for a moment and turns around to see everyone.

Bender: Well, I guess I'll catch up with you guys tomorrow, or Monday. See yah!

Andrew: Same here.

Claire: Yeah.

Allison nods.

Brian: Sure, thanks Bender.

Bernia: Stay out of trouble, my favorite knucklehead!

Bender smirks and nods. Then goes up the stairs, climbs up the hole on the ceiling which he fell from and climbs through back the heating duct to go back to the supply closet to get his stuff, leaving the rest of the gang sitting on the railing still and silent until Claire speaks.

Claire: Brian?

Brian: Hmm?

Claire: Are you gonna write your paper?

Brian: Yeah, why?

Claire: Well, it's kind of a waste for all of us to write our paper, don't you think?

Brian: Oh, but that's what Vernon wants us to do...

Bernia: (Stroking Brian's hair) Fuck Vern...

Claire laughs at Bernia's comment.

Claire: (To Brian) True, but I think we'd all kinda say the same thing.

Bernia: She's right.

Andrew looks at Allison who turns her head to look at him, but Andrew turns away quick. Brian thought about what Claire said and smirked.

Brian: (To Claire) You just don't wanna write your paper, right?

Claire gives a small smile.

Claire: True, but, you're the smartest, right?

Brian: (With pride) Oh, well...

Bernia chuckles.

Claire: (To Brian) We trust you...

Brian glances over to Andrew and Allison who nod in approval.

Andrew: Yeah...

Allison nods. Brian looks over to Bernia.

Bernia: Why not?

Brian: (To Claire) Alright, I'll do it!

Claire: Great...

It goes silent again. Claire looks at Allison who then looks back at her with wide eyes slightly backing up. Claire smiles.

Claire: (To Allison) Come on...

Allison: Where're we going?

Claire: Come on!

Claire and Allison go to a room.

Bernia: Hey! Wait up!

Bernia follows both of the girls.

Andrew and Brian are now the only ones left sitting on the railing.

Brian: (To Andrew) What a day, huh?

Andrew: Yeah. You're real lucky by the way.

Brian: Hmm?

Andrew: Bernia?

Brian: (Laughs) Oh, yeah.

Andrew: (Laughing) That girl has you by the balls, man!

Brian: Let's not get ahead of "that" subject. Well, time to write this essay.

Brian gets up and goes to write the paper, leaving Andrew on the railing by himself. Meanwhile, Claire and Bernia are helping Allison.

Claire: (To Allison) Don't be afraid.

Bernia: Yeah, just relax.

Claire is putting eye-makeup on Allison.

Allison: Don't stick that in my eye!

Claire: I'm not sticking it, just close...just go like that...

Claire closes her eyes and Allison mimics her.

Bernia: There ya go, Allison!

Claire: Good...

Claire puts the make-up on her and Allison squeals. Bernia giggles.

Claire: You know, you really do look at lot better without all that black shit on your eyes...

Allison: Hey...I like that black shit...

Bernia: This looks a lot better, Ally.

Claire: Look up...

Allison giggles and snorts.

Allison: (To Claire) Please, why're you being so nice to me?

Claire stops but smiles again quickly.

Claire: Because you're letting me.

Bernia smiles at Claire.

Brian is sitting, thinking about what he's going to write. After biting his pencil, he now starts writing. Andrew is just sitting on the railing still, thinking deep in thought. Meanwhile, Bender is back in the supply closet, fixing his shirt, silent. Then, Claire opens the door and enters with Bender looking at her.

Bender: (To Claire) You lost?

Claire stares at him. Bender smiles and so does she.

Brian is still busily preparing the essay. While Andrew is still thinking, he looks up to see a newly made-over Allison wearing the kind of clothes that Claire would wear. Her face clear as vanilla and her hair flat. Andrew stares at her in awe, gets off the railing and slowly starts walking to her. Brian looks up to see Allison who looks at him, he stares at her, she glares at him.

Brian: (Mouthing to Allison) Cool!

Allison: (Mouthing back to Brian smiling) Thank you!

In the closet, Claire kisses Bender's neck, then breaks it. Bender looks shocked.

Bender: Why'd you do that?

Claire: 'Cause I knew you wouldn't.

Bender: You know how you said before, how your parents used you to get back at each other... Wouldn't I be outstanding in that capacity?

Claire: Were you really disgusted about what I did with my lipstick?

Bender: Truth?

Claire: Truth...

Bender: (Nodding) No...

Claire smiles at him and he smiles back. They stare at each other until Claire bites her lip and then goes to kiss Bender again but this time on the lips, making it deep and passionate with Bender gently grabbing Claire's jaw.

Back in the library, Brian has finished writing the essay. He kisses it as if he wrote something legendary. Andrew and Allison are talking.

Andrew: (To Allison) What happened to you?

Allison: Why? Claire did it! What's wrong?

Andrew: Nothing's wrong, it's just so different. I can see your face.

Allison: Is that good or bad?

Andrew: (Laughing) It's real good!

Allison stays quiet then speaks one last time.

Allison: Andrew...I don't want to be alone...anymore.

Andrew: You don't have to be.

Andrew smiles and then she smiles. Andrew walks closer to her, gently touches her shoulders and then gently moves his hands to her neck. Brian laughs and gives himself an congratulatory punch to the arm, Bernia then comes behind him without knowing as he stands up, he turns around to meet her gaze.

Bernia: Surprise!

Brian: Hey.

Bernia: Missed me?

Brian: I'd had to be an idiot not to-

Brian didn't finish because Bernia putted her hands on his cheeks and started kissing Brian passionately with her tongue in his mouth. She then breaks it. Brian's expression said it all.

Bernia: I knew you had to be a great kisser, Brian. You wanna try again, If you don't mind?

Brian nodded as she kisses him again with the same passion. Both of their eyes closed, Bernia moves her hands from Brian's cheeks now grabbing the inside of his pants. Brian's eyes widen and he lets out several moans as Bernia is still kissing him, then breaks it again so they could breath.

Brian: (Giggling) Holy shit...

Bernia giggles.

Bernia: Brian? Did you mean what you said, about that you'll never betray us?

Brian: Of course! I'd rather burn in hell first before I do something like that...

Bernia: ( Smiling) Well, I think I now know what your name means...

Brian: My name has a meaning? What is it?

Bernia: (Calmly) Coincidentally, your name is of Irish and Breton origin, as well as Occitan, derived from an old Celtic word. Which therefore means...your name means "high" or "noble".

Brian: So...my name is related to your mother's homeland, right?

Bernia: Mmm Hmm. Which to me, your very high on defending people and your noble no matter what. That's why I love you.

Brian: (Laughs) I should warn you, you'll be spending the rest of your life with a nerd. It's just Bernia...you really don't know me that well.

Bernia: (Laughs) I wouldn't have it any other way. Because, you matter to me, Brian Johnson. And, I would love nothing more then "getting" to know you better. I'm with you now Brian, we're together for life...

They both smile and Bernia hugs Brian real tight, then put their faces together nose to nose with their eyes closed.

Now, the six students are walking through the hallway, Claire next to Bender, Allison next to Andrew and Brian and Bernia next to each other in front of the other four holding hands. They all meet up with Carl again, sweeping up and Brian nods at him.

Carl: See ya Brian...

Brian: You too, Carl.

Bernia: Bye, Carl.

Carl waves at her.

Bender: (To Carl) See you next Saturday!

Carl: You bet!

They all now got to the parking lot. Brian's dad shows up, but Brian and Bernia goes to her motorcycle. Andrew and Allison kiss, Allison then rips a patch off and takes it along with Andrew's hoodie and gets into the car. Andrew's father shows up, looks at him then at Allison. Andrew gets in the truck and they drive off. So does Allison and her mother. Claire takes off one of her diamond earrings and gives it to Bender in his gloved hand and places her fingertips over his hand into a palm. They stare at each other and then kiss again. After they break, Bender holds his head down on her jacket and she smiles. Claire gets into her father's BMW and leaves. Bender grins as the car drives off and then places the earring on his ear. Brian and Bernia are talking again. She has her arms over his neck.

Bernia: Brian?

Brian: Hmm?

Bernia takes off her ring, places it on Brian's finger.

Brian: Are you sure? I mean-

Bernia hushes him by placing a finger over his mouth and nods.

Bernia: This will bring you luck, as it did me....wear it well for me, okay?

Brian: (Nodding) Okay.

She smiles. Brian's father honks the horn catching his attention.

Brian's Father: Come on, Brian!

Brian looks back at Bernia. He then touches her cheek and then Bernia touches both his cheeks and they kiss one last time, but it won't be the final time. But she then also licks and bites Brian's neck and does it again to his ear leaving him with two small hickies in both places.

Bernia: Bye, Brian.

Brian: Bye. I'll see you Monday.

Bernia: (Smiling) You too.

Brian get into the car and his father drives off. Bernia bites her lip in happiness. She then sees Bender who's stands there.

Bernia: Hey, Bender!

Bender looks at her.

Bernia: Ya need a lift?

Bender: (Shaking his head) Nope. I'm good from here. See ya Monday and the next Saturday!

Bernia: Oh, yeah! I forgot! Alright! Later days!

Bender: Rock and Roll!

Bernia gets on her motorcycle, starts it and drives off leaving Bender to walk home. He walks out to the football field with his shades on and hands in his coat pockets. Meanwhile, Vernon goes into the library now empty. He goes over to pick up Brian's essay and reads it.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Brian: (Epilogue) Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever is was we did wrong. What we did was wrong, but we think you're crazy making us write an essay telling you who we think we are. Why do you even care? You see us as you wanna see us, in the simplest terms, and the most convenient definitions. We all saw each other how we did at seven o'clock earlier this morning because we were brainwashed...But what we found out, is that each one of us is a brain...

Bernia: "A breed..."

Andrew: "And a athlete..."

Allison: "And a basket case..."

Claire: "A princess..."

Bender: "And a criminal..."

Brian: (Finishing epilogue) Does that answer your question? Also we learned that no matter how you look or what your label is, that's just Shermer High School. And, it's certainly not the way you pick who you want to hang out with, become friends with, or even date. Labels don't matter. It's not going to break our chain of everlasting friendship, nor our new relationships. We'll see you Monday, Mr. Vernon.

Sincerely yours,

The Breakfast Club.

As he's walking on the field, Bender then after reaching the end of the field pumps his fist in the air in victory.

The End.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do plan on doing a sequel but it probably won't happen for a while because I'm very busy with other things. So just have faith in me. :)


End file.
